Posts that inspiring an elegant life

Elegant Party Protocol

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Many of us get invited to parties or have office functions but for the most part, most of us will not be invited to state receptions or official balls.

Mr. MacPherson did however give great advice on how to have excellent etiquette and how to handle important events.

* Be on time (of course): When it comes to important events, there is no such thing as “fashionably late”. Be a few minutes early if you will have to check your coat or if you don’t know exactly where to go. 




* Do not lobby: An official event is not the time to lobby for your cause, no matter what cause it is. Use the event as a social time to get to know people, and contact your new connections on specific matters after the event is over. 

Photo by Mat Reding on Unsplash

* Never ask for more food: Asking for a second helping of something will draw unwanted attention. Large events are generally planned down to the minute. By asking for more food you may upset the timing of a dinner, and insult your host or hostess.





photo credit Marchioness Instagram account
* Connect with your host and hostess: Make an effort to speak with your host and hostess. Remember to take only a few minutes of their time. They do have to entertain other guests. 





Photo by Micheile Henderson on Unsplash




And last but certainly not least…..

* Leave gracefully: Usually, once the guest of honour has left it is your turn to do so. Finish one last dance or cocktail at the bar, then say your good nights and head for the door. 


These are some great tips and reminders from our great butler. I know that I will be adding these to my mental memory. I hope you enjoyed them. 

(text Charles MacPherson)











Tips for First Impressions ~ The Butler Speaks

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Okay, I have pulled out my book The Butler Speaks book once again. I shared some blog posts about this book, see here, here, and here. Now I am on etiquette and these tips from Mr. MacPherson are very interesting.

Mr. MacPherson believes that a good butler has much to teach us about how to make a good first impression and wants us to consider these pointers as a first-impression success no matter what the circumstance.

*  When meeting someone for the first time, repeat his or her name in your conversation. A butler will call the guest Mr. or Mrs. plus their last name. He will never address a guest by first name. 


*  Use the appropriate amount of formality depending on the circumstance, but whenever you’re uncertain, err on the side of being more formal, at least at first. Most people will tell you if they’d prefer a less formal style of address, but few will tell you when you’ve erred and gone too informal. 


*  Listen carefully when you meet someone, not only to the words a person uses but also to their underlying meaning. Respond when appropriate, and be generous and gracious. 





























Photo by Matthijs Smit on Unsplash

*  Always maintain eye contact

*  Be careful of using humor. If you are meeting someone for the first time, you do not want to offend them.

*  Check your ego at the door. Wait until you have established credibility before you even consider challenging someone you’ve just met. 


*  Choose your words carefully because, rightly or wrongly, what you say will be used to judge your intelligence, education, culture, and abilities. 



I have really enjoyed these pointers and hope to be sharing more.

My Visit to Williams Sonoma

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After my husband and I visited Restoration Hardware we decided to walk down to Williams Sonoma. When we walked in we saw their wonderful new dinnerware collection called The Japanese Table and oh is it pretty!


My husband even liked it!! I wish I had taken pictures but I was so busy looking at everything. 








This was our favorite.
Garden Dinner Plates

We did however end up purchasing the placemats. 

Cherry Blossom Place Mats

The next beautiful set I saw was the Citrus Dinnerware Collection.






This was so pretty in person.











Smoke Goblets


I wish I had taken pictures of these. They are much prettier in person.




Glass Candlestick Holders






This collection was really pretty in person also.






Kate Spade New York Collection








It would be great to organize your kitchen with…





Blue and White Ceramic Cachepot





And last but certainly not least this new floral scent called White Gardenia. I did not get a chance to smell it but I will be going back soon. 








Well, I hope you enjoyed this post and if you have a moment to visit your Williams Sonoma I hope that you will share your finds as well!




(photos via  Mrs. Shockley)

Tilly’s Tea Room ~ A New Tea Room Find

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Okay, so for those who know me they know that I love a good tea room. I have been to about two so far. My first one was the Ayres Tea Room, see here.  The second was called the Cakebake Shop, see here.

Now, when my husband and I went shopping for dinner tables this past weekend we ended up finding another one!  I was really excited. I have never heard of it.

Tilly’s Tea Room

Here is a little bit about the owner:
Tilly’s opened in February 2015 and brings the traditional English tearoom to suburban Fishers with a modern-day spin. Owner Sharon Moore, originally from Newcastle, England, came to the states 12 years ago as a television producer for Champ Car. Putting the brakes on her career after having her children Max and Tilly, the tearoom’s namesake, and no longer wanting to travel for work, Moore created a tea room that combines her English sensibilities and enjoyment of good food in a child friendly atmosphere.
Tilly’s uses traditional english recipes to serve a menu consisting of soups, salads, sandwiches and panini’s as well as a Traditional English Afternoon Tea. Home made fruit scones are served with strawberry jam or lemon curd and real Devonshire Clotted Cream. Tea’s are imported from England and feature favourites like Ginger Peach,  Blueberry Elderflower and Chocolate Superberry. 
After spending two years coming up with the styles and ideas for the tea room. Tilly’s features a play room for children and hosts special events such as birthday parties, bridal and baby showers and open house events

Love the table!

A great space for a bridal shower.

Okay, love the silver.
My husband actually found this spot and has already said that he will take me to lunch there soon. I am really excited! I hope you enjoyed this post and for those of you who actually live in my city I hope that you will go and take a look at it soon. 
(photos via Mrs. Shockley,info about the owner from Tilly.com)

Their website is here.

Dress for Success ~ Volunteering as a Personal Shopper

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This past week was my orientation to volunteer to be a personal shopper for Dress for Success. Dress for Success is a non-profit organization that empowers women to get employment and keep it.

The program provides women with interview attire and other pieces of casual clothing for their work environment. There is also a career development services program that promotes employment retention and career advancement.

After our meeting we got a tour of the boutique and I was impressed….

This is inside the office. There is a piano that has hand craved artwork on it. The office manager said that sometimes women come and “ticker” on it. I know I will end up doing that.
This is artwork done by one of our local artist. It was presented during one of their fashion shows. 
This is inside the boutique. The clients will get everything. They get jewelry, hosiery, new bras, shoes and a bag!
I loved seeing this! This was done by California Closets. I look forward to serving women in my community as their personal shopper and I look forward to putting together some great looks!
I believe serving is elegant….


(photos via Mrs. Shockley)

A Friend’s Winter Wedding

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Earlier this month some good friends of ours shared their beautiful wedding with us. It was at the Community Life Center here in our city and it was gorgeous! I was so glad that we got to share this wonderful event with them and see this beautiful venue.

There were beautiful chandeliers everywhere….
During cocktail hour my husband and I had wine, a few snacks and just looked around.
There were about 3 or 4 of these gorgeous chandeliers. I could not stop staring and kept taking pictures of them!
There was a very pretty fountain in the center of the venue….
After drinks, dinner and dancing my husband and I were getting ready to head out when we were told about this gorgeous chandelier on the 3rd floor…
It was truly amazing. I could have stayed there all night looking at it. We really enjoyed ourselves and our friends. It was a great way to begin the holiday season.




(all photos via Mrs. Shockley)

The Nutcracker Ballet ~ Our Second Visit

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My daughter and I are trying to make going to the ballet to see The Nutcracker a yearly tradition. Last year was our first year and we really enjoyed it (read about it here).

This year the show was in a different location. It was at the Murat Theater which was much bigger than the Scottish Rite Cathedral last year.


This was a great location! They sold snacks which is wonderful when you have an 11-year-old. So we grabbed some drinks and our popcorn and went to our seats.


All the halls were long and huge!

This is how close we were to the stage. If the ballet is here next year then I am going to get us balcony seats! My daughter really wanted to see the orchestra.


While were in line my daughter and I started talking to some of the other guests and we ended up meeting a french woman! I was really excited! After the show was over we hunted her down because we both wanted to talk with her. 


We ended up finding her and I asked her questions about french living and where to visit in France. She told me everything. How it was wonderful to live in France and which parts to stay away from. She also told me about a program here in our city for high school students.


Apparently, there is a program that let’s high school students stay in France with a host family for 6 weeks! I will definitely be looking into that program for my daughter. 


I also checked the schedule and Swan Lake will be there in June. I will be getting tickets to that! I really enjoy the ballet and want to continue to go to shows with my daughter. 

Seek the arts……..

(photos via Mrs. Shockley)