Blog posts that inspire

Retro Customs Worth Reviving

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I love lists about beautiful things. I recently stumbled on this list from Veranda called 25 Things That Should Have Never Gone Out of Style.

It is a wonderful list if you enjoy manners, dignity and wholesomeness. I wanted to share some of my favorite things from this list.

1) Handwritten notes: 
YES! I talked about this on the blog back in 2015. See it here if you missed it.

2) Recipe cards: 
Having grandmas vintage recipe cards are keepsakes

3) Modesty:
REALLY, we do need it!

4) Dressing up:
Again, we do need it! There is nothing more satisfying to me than seeing someone dress to the nines and enjoying it.

5) Baby Books:
I have one for my daughter and she enjoys looking in it all the time. She finds it rewarding to know that I care enough to “keep up” with her life. I still take a photo of her on her first day of school and put it in our photo album. I want her to enjoy these for years to come.

6) Memorizing Phone Numbers:
I grew up in an age where cell phones were a luxury! We had pagers and that was pushing it but I remember every number that was on my pager.

7) Saying “Sir or Ma’am”:
I still say this and we teach our children to do the same.

8) Privacy:
It can been tough trying to find the balance between sharing and keeping things private. But there are some things that you should keep behind closed doors and it should be common sense. But it is not anymore. See my blog post here, here, and here about keeping your life a mystery.

9) Printed photos:
I can’t stress the act of keeping memories enough. I love looking at old photos in albums. I even print off my blog post and keep them in binders. Who knows maybe one day the computers will crash and I won’t have my blog anymore. I want to be able to look back on this and smile and I want my grandchildren to see what I enjoy and be in my world for a moment.

10) Curves:
I have them and honestly who doesn’t?

11) Calling someone:
My husband is very adamant about this. He would rather pick up the phone than text.

12) Doing math in your head:
Yeah, I have seen some young people who were my cashiers and couldn’t do basic math in their head. It was really sad….

13) Knowing your neighbors by name:
Okay, this one I struggle a little with. We HAD some neighbors (they have since move out of the neighborhood). Our daughter’s played together then I let our daughter go over for a sleepover. It took me awhile to let her do this but I did. This mother was such a trouble maker on Facebook (I was “friends” with her) that I knew it was going to be a bad idea. She asked my daughter, “if I was really like that”? I was completely “floored” by this but not surprised. She asked my husband some questions in the past so I knew that she was trying to find dirt on us. Since she was reading my blog and on my page she saw what I posted and just thought I was fake. But the joke was on her, we ended up finding out that they were lying to everyone and telling people that they bought the house that they were in but it turns out they were renting and things just weren’t what they seem.  They have since moved and built in a neighborhood near us (going with our builder I might add) and I heard that she painted her house the same color as mine. Now who is not who they seem? Looks like I am the leader and she is the follower.

I have blocked her from my personal Facebook page and will continue to block her from all my social media outlets. She also stole a photo from my blog about some dinning room table ideas and presented it on her page as her own but what she didn’t realize was that one of those photos belong to my friend so I knew that she stole it. She probably still sneaks on here and reads my blog but I try to not let stupid people like that ruin the opportunity for me to meet the other neighbors around us.

14) Paper Address Books:
They are useful just in case that phone shuts down.

15) Teaching Cursive:
This is a beautiful technique to have with you. There was someone whom I met recently that was surprised that I could write in cursive and said that they didn’t learn that in school. How tragic? How do you sign your credit card slips? I wrote about cursive writing back in 2014 see it here.

16) Keeping a Diary:
I think this is a wonderful way to release some emotions and concerns. It is also a way to keep a record of victories and loses. I wrote about it last year see here if you missed it.

17) Drive in Moves:
I loved this as a kid and may have to consider trying this again….

18) Saying Please and Thank You:
There is no question for this. It’s unbelievable to me how rude people really are….

19) Going visiting and having Sunday dinners:
We still have dinners every night as a family.

20) Not using Bad words:
There is nothing more classless then hearing a woman curse on the phone. I try to never use any of these words in private or in public.

21) Table Manners:
Yes, phones have made a mess of things if you ask me. Read my blog post here about that.

22) Hats:
I love seeing the old photos when hats and gloves were worn.

23) Having a real LIVE conversation:
It’s nice to take some time and talk with people. I sometimes start a conversation with someone on the elevator just because I know that they are going to pull out that phone.



and last but certainly not least,

24) Holding the door for someone:
I do this always but I LOVE seeing men do it. I hope shivery isn’t dead.

Well, I hope that you enjoy this list just as much as I did and read the original article from Veranda. They always have the best information on their website.





(photos via Pinterest, list via Veranda.com)

The Goops ~ A poem about manners

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~ The Goops




The Goops they lick their fingers,


And the Goops they lick their knives;


They spill their broth on the tablecloth-


Oh, they lead disgusting lives!


The Goops they talk while eating,


And loud and fast they chew;


And that is why I’m glad that I am NOT a Goop – are you?


~ Gelett Burgess

photo credit This is Glamorous Instagram account

Living La Dolce Vita

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About a week ago I shared on the blog about living “la dolce vita”. I loved the tips that Kristi Belcamino gave in her book La Bella Figura. Now I have finished reading it and wanted to share a particular section of the book.

Kristi gave a wonderful description of her inner Italian Girl Gabriella and how she lived. It is truly inspiring…

Gabriella luxuriously cups her hand around her warm cafe au lait bowl, taking sips between bits of her homemade bread, toasted and buttered……
























Photo by Brigitte Tohm on Unsplash

For summer lunches she will eat a salad and during the winter- a bowl of soup with a small piece of bread and a sliver of gourmet cheese. 



For dinner, she will eat pasta, chicken, or fish with a vegetable salad along with a glass of wine. She usually reserves desserts for Sundays. (I need to adopt this rule!)


On Sundays, she refrains from spending any money. (Oh dear…) 


During the warmer months, meals are eaten en tavola, al fresco, at the picnic table on her patio. 



Photo by Brigitte Tohm on Unsplash


A colorful tablecloth is complimented by big terra cotta pots of red geraniums bordering the patio.

Gabriella fills her life with intellectual, emotional, and spiritual pursuits; spending her free time focused on books, film, food, good conversation, and good friends. She strives to live a life rich in experience and not things. (Wow, focusing on experiences, not things)


photo credit La Morena 

She owns a small, but perfect -fitting wardrobe. Every item is of the highest quality she can afford and works with her body, style, and life. She buys new items rarely and with much thought. She resists impulse buys…..



When she does buy something it is from a list of clothing items she needs to replace or feels will be an important addition to her wardrobe….




Photo by Sigmund on Unsplash


Her pantry is slim. She doesn’t buy in bulk unless it is during her quarterly trip to a warehouse store where she will stock up on olive oil, Parmigiano Reggiano, coffee, and dried pasta from Italy. Otherwise, she shops two to three times a week, filling her French market basket mostly with fresh produce.


She never snacks and always sits to eat. (This is major!!!) She always puts her utensils down between her small bites. She chews slowly, savoring all the flavors.


Her kitchen is small and meticulously kept clean and free of clutter, like the rest of her home. In fact, everything in her home is either beautiful or useful. She lives by the William Morris adage that “Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.”

This quote is so meaningful to me…..

photo credit This is Glamorous Instagram account
The decor theme in her home revolves around unique, mostly original artwork, lots of books, plants, and big comfy furniture with sumptuous fabrics and soft, sparkling lighting. She has a few treasured items displayed that are meaningful to her, but her real joy lies in her bookshelves, where she keeps only well-loved volumes.

She has developed an aura of mystique, refraining from sharing details of her life with acquaintances. She tries not to talk about herself but instead talks about ideas. She can intelligently discuss the latest local, national or international news or a new book or film she has seen. She is very passionate but is able to share her opinions in a poised manner. 


She does not worry anymore. She is assertive. She can respond to requests by saying, “No, I’m sorry I can’t do that,” or “I’m sorry I don’t attend (home sales parties), but thank you for asking,” without feeling the need to explain or defend herself. She also does not elaborate on a compliment but simply says a gracious “thank you.” 

photo credit Nicola Bathie Instagram account
Every day she makes sure to count her blessings and appreciate her life right then and there. 




This was such a wonderful section in the book. I did not share it all. There was way more information about her inner Italian girl so I would encourage you to download the book to your Kindle or order it. It was a wonderful read.



To read my other blog posts about inspiring Italian women see here, here, here, and here.






Enjoy!



Enjoy La Dolce Vita

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I mentioned on the blog that I have been reading Kristi Belcamino’s book La Bella Figura: How to live a chic, simple, and European- inspired life and it has been very inspiring so far.

I am still at the beginning but I have gotten to a section of the book where Kristi gave 12 Easy Things to Do to Enjoy La Dolce Vita and I wanted to share them.

1) Dine al fresco whenever you have the chance. Even if you live in an apartment in a big city, have a picnic at the park, eat at a sidewalk cafe, or if you have a rooftop, you can have a picnic on a blanket with votive candles. If you have a small balcony, invest in a cafe table and chair and wait until dark to light some candles and eat, admiring the city lights. If you have a backyard, carve out a small area for a picnic or bistro table and set a table with real dishes and linens each night.

photo credit Kadarius Seegars 


2) Turn off the T.V. Go for a walk, listen to music, take a bath, play cards, read a book, take pictures, polish your toenails, make art, write a letter, make love, garden, write poetry eat ice cream, daydream.






Photo by Charisse Kenion on Unsplash




3) Walk. If you can, walk as often as possible instead of driving. It is good exercise, but also puts you in touch with the world around you in a meaningful way.



photo credit Pinterest 

4) Learn to prepare one fantastically delicious meal that makes you happy to make and to eat. 


Photo by Joseph Gonzalez on Unsplash

5) Use cloth napkins and set a table every meal, even if you are dining alone.


photo credit Aerin Lauder Instagram account



6) Eat slowly and savor the taste of your food.


7) Don’t schedule every minute of your life. Give yourself time to nap, read a book or stare at the clouds. 



photo credit Annie Spratt 



8) Take a class in something you are interested in: stained glass, yoga, cooking, you name it.

    Read my blog post about our cooking class here.




9) Study a foreign language, even if you already are bilingual. 
    Read my blog post about a foreign language app that I use here.



10) Find your passions: be it French history, cooking, sculpture or roller-skating and devote meaningful time to it each week. 





Photo by Matthew Daniels on Unsplash




11) Have people over for dinner. I learned living in a 300 -square-foot studio apartment in Oakland that it doesn’t matter how big your place is or how good a cook you are, you can still host a dinner party where people enjoy themselves so much that you have to ask them to leave at 4 a.m. so you can go to bed. Invite people to dine with you, even if you are just having soup. Add some wine, fresh bread, break out the stories, guitar, or playing cards, and enjoy each other’s company.





I enjoyed watching this video with Garance talking about entertaining the french way. 

12) Buy beautiful clothes, even- especially- if you can only afford to purchase one new outfit each year.




















photo credit Alyssa Hurley 

I hope you all enjoyed Kristi’s tips and I hope to share more from this book as I continue to read it. Until then enjoy La Dolce Vita!


Wonderful Reminders for Elegance

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In 2004 the very talented Kate Spade wrote wonderful books. They were called Manners, Style, and Occasions. In each book Kate gave wonderful notes, ideas and suggestions on how to accomplish each of this items.

I purchased her book called “Style” a couple of years ago. It talked about everything from travel, to colors, posture and wardrobe classics. It has been a great addition to my library.

Recently, I remembered her other book called “Manners”. I decided to jump on Amazon and take a peek at it and ended up purchasing it right away. I am excited to read it and will share some tips from it once I receive it.




















I did however ended up seeing this list in her book and wanted to share it….


10 Gentle Reminders

~ Making others feel at ease is the essence of etiquette, yesterday and today

~ There are few words more elementary or more welcomed than please and thank you

~ Good moods are contagious. Hopefully, yours will be pleasantly catching

~ Be aware and considerate of personal space- physical, visual and aural

~ Showing respect is a gift, one that costs nothing and is endlessly appreciated

~ Think of your tone of voice as a telegraph. To the listener, it speaks volumes

~ A short fuse does nothing but burn. Should you find yourself with one, steer clear of others

~ Never underestimate the message that’s sent by your poise and your posture

~ Clothes count. Appropriate attire is not only respectful, but it’s also refreshing 


~ Let common sense by your guide and graciousness your goal








~ The Daily Life of Manners, Kate Spade



Inspiration from High Society

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High Society is one of my favorite classic films. Every time I watch it I draw inspiration from it. I especially love the scene with Celeste Holm and Frank Sinatra. They play reporters at the “wedding of the season.”
The room full of “elegant junk” is just something to swoon about if you love antiques. Above is a look book from Veranda magazine. Carisha Swanson pulled together some current décor items that would come pretty close to that elegant room that Celeste was talking about.
I love item number 4. The Tyntesfield wallpaper. Oh goodness so beautiful! If you have not seen the movie High Society then you should definitely add it to your list to watch. It is sure to inspire you. But I have included the scene with Fred and Celeste below. Enjoy!
(photo via Veranda.com)

Challenges in the Office

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I was inspired to write this post recently. Have you ever worked with a “nasty woman”? I mean you can just tell that they are “mean spirited”? I am working with one now.

I used to sit across from her when I first started my job as a legal assistant and I heard her just “trash” people all the time. I never engaged in those conversations with her just listened. I use to share things about my life with her and talk with her but 2 years ago I just got tired of being “friends” with her.

There were several moments when I would say good morning to her and she would not say it back. I remember one of our fellow co-worker’s being promoted and she came to my cubicle to ask why that individual was promoted and I told her it was because she was suppose to be at that level. She then proceeded to say that “she could run circles around her”. Basically, she was saying that she was a better candidate.

What baffled me was that she went to lunch with the person that she was trashing! It was unbelievable!

my photo

I was just tired of it. So I started to just ignore her. I stopped saying good morning, I stopped speaking to her period. I just stayed away from her. Well, she didn’t like it. She tried several times to get me in trouble at the office. I always have fresh flowers in my office. I even had them in my cubicle when I sat across from her for 2 years. Well last year after we all got promoted, I was placed in an office next to her. I knew it was going to be awful. 



photo credit Marchioness Instagram account



It was the month of my birthday and I was awarded our first employee award! I was so excited and surprised. Well, two weeks later I had a bouquet of white lilies in my office. Now we all know that lilies can be very strong. Well at 4 in the afternoon on a Friday she comes to my office and asked if I could shut my door because my flowers were too strong. Excuse me? “You have a door why can’t you shut yours”? People had been coming by my office for the whole week telling me that they loved the flowers and the smell. The interesting thing about that situation as she was leaving at 4:30 and it was FRIDAY!!! I had them for the whole week! Why are you complaining now when you leave in 30 minutes? 



photo credit Micheile Henderson 

I knew then that she was being petty. I had her shut my door and I took the flowers home which I was going to anyway because it was the end of the week. Well, I came back Monday morning and I told my supervisor first thing that morning what happened on Friday and told her that I took the flowers home. She assured me that all is well but it was not. 


As soon as I came to my office one of the attorneys that I worked with came by and said that my NEW flowers were beautiful. The “nasty” co-worker then rushes out of her office and tells our chief that my flowers are making her swell and giving her allergies. Only she didn’t know that the new flowers were unscented and were not the same. 

photo credit Melnychuk Nataliya 
She didn’t know that the lilies were gone so she looked like a fool. Not to mention I reminded the chief that I sat across from her for 2 years and she did not complain then (when I was talking to her). Also, she had gotten roses from her husband (inspired by me of course) a few months prior and last time I checked those are pretty scented themselves. I was truly disgusted by her. Maya Angelou said, “when someone shows you who they really are the first time, believe them”. I believe her. She is truly nasty. 


My supervisor told me to ‘stay in my lane” and not worry about her. She assured me that the leaders in our office knew about the situation and that there was no need to worry. I did not start it she did. I knew that she had a reputation for not getting along with people. So I NEVER addressed her just moved right along. The chief also told me that, “you can’t control what she does, all you can control is you”. She is right.  

photo credit Micheile Henderson 

Some of my fellow co-workers said that they would have “told her off”. But my husband and supervisor kept telling me to just continue to ignore her. She wanted my attention and needed it. She needed something “bad” to say about me because honestly, she has no dirt on me. I have a good reputation at the office. I don’t have any “home drama”. I dress well, drive well, vacation well, and work well. She has NO dirt and she needs it bad. She ended up moving herself to another office. I continue to ignore her and continue with my work. 


I have noticed that I am progressing in my life. I want to be a paralegal supervisor someday and I know I will. 


What I have learned about that situation is to “rise above it”. Rise above people who want to cause trouble because they are jealous of you. Continue to dress your best, speak your best, work your best and live your best. Enjoy and do things that are in line with your beauty. Don’t start to do the “my horse is bigger than your horse race with people like that. 



photo credit Nicolas Fairford



You would have to lower your standards to be where they are. I would have to lower my standards to dress like her, live like her, and act like her. I refuse. I refuse to be a class-less, backstabbing woman. That population is already high. I read in a daily devotional that said, “Comparison only leads to over-looking and wastefulness”. She is one of those people. Very insecure. 


I heard a story about Michelangelo. One of his rival sculptors wanted to ruin his reputation. So he went to the Pope and convinced him to require Michelangelo to paint the Sistine Chapel in Rome. Well, Michelangelo was not a painter but a sculptor. His rival sculptor knew that and thought that he would fail. So Michelangelo agreed and for 4 long years, he painted it and became the most famous artist of all time. But did I mention the name of his rival? No, because I don’t know his name and most people don’t know his name. And Michelangelo did not sink down to his level. He simply stayed the course and stayed focused on his work and succeeded. 



photo credit Ulker Mammadova 



So let’s paint our Sistine Chapels. Let’s move forward in our dreams and goals and let trash take out the trash. People who are evil will reap what they sow, more than they sow and later than they sow but their crops WILL COME! And in most cases for me, I am always a spectator to their downfall. I will continue to fight to be an elegant woman every day of my life.