Radiate Calm

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This past May I shared a book that I was reading called Treating People Well and in that post I talked about the Power of Charm and how to present yourself at parties and in small groups. That section of the book provided great pointers on how to mingle properly.

Today I want to share their chapter called “Radiate Calm”. When I read the title was intrigued and curious but this happened to be one of the best chapters that I have read so far!

This chapter starts off with a wonderful quote on how to “radiate calm”. It said….

“Staying calm is assertive. When you remain serene, you’re communicating that you have the situation under control and there’s nothing to worry about…… It’s tempting to fly off the handle in a confrontational moment, but far more valuable to bring goodwill and order back to an unraveling situation. Maintaining a sense of equanimity even when matters are tense disarms antagonists, builds trust, and forces everyone involved to focus on the problem logically rather than emotionally, allowing for better and quicker resolutions”. 





Photo by Carmine Furletti on Unsplash

WOW, I had to underline that in the book! I keep going back to it trying to remind myself to radiate calm. I even put some of the words in my day designer as reminders throughout the day. 



Lea and Jeremy provided four ways to radiate calm under any circumstance. 1) Stay composed, 2) Avoid drama, 3) Find common ground and 4) Maintain perspective. 




Photo by Johanne Kristensen on Unsplash


Lea stated, “acting with cool precision can help you appear powerful and in control, even if you might be rolling on the inside”……





In the avoid drama section they mentioned, “don’t get angry; get things done” and this wonderful quote which I keep telling myself, “rising calmly above”. I ADORE this quote! I have written it down several times already. And this wonderful thought still holds true, ” we learned to turn the other cheek at rude behavior”. Even though I believe that there is a time to address rude people and then there is a time not to. When it comes to family and close friends, okay to address the rude behavior. When it comes to someone driving next to me or a person that I know that I am not going to see for the rest of my life, I simply turn my cheek to their rude behavior. 



photo credit Karolina Bobek

“Often it isn’t important to know why someone is behaving in a certain way; what matters is how you respond”. I remember my mentor telling me that sometimes you have to think about why someone is acting a certain way and in most cases, it has nothing to do with you. 


And always keep this in mind drama begets drama. This is soooo true! I know we have all heard of the old saying, “misery loves company”. Well so does drama!  Drama filled people attract who they are. So stay clear of them. 


Other issues discussed were: recognizing hot buttons. If someone likes stirring the pot and can’t respect opinions that differ from his own, think carefully about including him in gatherings with people of varied views. Don’t escalate: take what people are saying at face value and act on the facts you know, not the emotions you may feel. Temper your tone: there will probably be a few times when you wish you had voice your anger more forcefully, but more often we wish we’d said less. Find common ground: don’t shy away from becoming an intermediary between two parties in conflict if you can help them arrive at a resolution. You may feel trapped at first, but remember that if you treat both sides with equal respect and honesty and have an investment in the outcome, this is a position of influence. 



I have so many highlighted sections in this chapter. It really hit home for me as I have been dealing with co-worker pettiness (read my post here about that), disrespectful family members and trying to navigate a hormonal teenager. I normally repeat in my mind this saying from Pastor Charles Stanley, “maintain quiet spirit”. Now I can add “radiate calm” and “calmly rise above it”. I hope that you enjoyed these tips from the book and as I proceed on I will share anything else that I believe will add a dose of elegance to our lives. 


Enjoy!
(photo via Pinterest)

(tips: Authors Lea Berman and Jeremy Bernard) 


Feminine Herbal Care

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A few weeks ago my favorite author Jennifer L. Scott introduced this wonderful book on her Youtube channel called The Woman’s Herbal Apothecary. I was so intrigued by her video that I purchased the book for myself.

I have had it for a month and have not put it down. I have been on a weight loss journey for sometime now and since my body is changing so much I have decided not to put some much pressure on myself to lose weight at a rapid pace. I asked myself recently, “why am I in a hurry?” I think since we are in a world where everything is expected in such a short amount of time we put these unreasonable time constraints to do everything. Instead of trying to lose weight so fast I have decided to educate myself on my body and food and I am loving this decision. 
In the beginning of the book JJ Pursell talked about having a positive feminine practice and giving thanks for all that you have, even when it doesn’t feel like much. She also discussed the importance of understanding p.m.s. and not feeling like it it is a curse. She shares information on what herbs to use to help with mood swings and bloating. I actually found a herbal tea that helps with bloating and water retention. It works and has a wonderful cranberry flavor to it. 
There is a chapter on how to use herbal medicines and understanding herbal language. There are lists about several of the herbs that she uses and their purpose. 
Of course there are chapters about menstruation and what herbs and tonics to use to help with cramping and bleeding. 
(click on photos to enlarge them)
There is information about pregnancy and labor support. There were also chapters about infections and herbs you can use for those. This is such a wonderful book! 
After only a week of reading it I was at our organic grocery store buying herbal teas and fresh fruits and vegetables, organic eggs and whole grains. My body has been feeling much better the last two weeks. 
I have also added evening walks to my routine. I want to be diligent about keeping my body moving and developing a lifestyle change and not just a fad. 
Being a woman is wonderful thing. I believe it and do my very best to walk in it. 
Purchasing this book has really opened my eyes to learning about how to heal my body naturally and to stop and take my time at learning about my body and not to rush it. 
There are wonderful herbs out there for us and it will take time to change your body but I believe it will be worth the journey. 
If you wish to watch Jennifer’s book review you may do so here. This is the video that inspired to me buy this book. Thanks for reading!!! 

(photos via Mrs. Shockley and Pinterest)

Charleston’s Angel Oak Tree

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Magnificent isn’t it?
This is the Angel Oak tree in Charleston. This is one of the last places that we visited on our trip. Some people kept telling us that it was 1,500 years old but the most common estimate is 400 to 500 years old. 
The tree is a southern live oak tree and is located on Johns Island in Charleston. 
It was truly a sight to see in person. 
I am glad that the city is protecting this. If the facts are true then this tree was planted around the 1600’s! That’s remarkable! It appears that it could have existed around the same time that the Magnolia Plantation was established. 
It was truly exquisite to see and just staring at it just makes you imagine of the things that this tree has seen. It is truly remarkable.
I hope that you enjoyed this post! Thank you for reading!

(photos via Mrs. Shockley) 

Our Visit to The Magnolia Plantation in Charleston

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Sorry for the delay and non-post on Monday. I was having some Google trouble and had to wait a day to fix it. I have been trying to get the photos together for this post. I knew that I had a lot and that it would take awhile to download them to the blog. But without further ado……

On our second day in Charleston last month my family and I decided to visit Magnolia Plantation & Gardens. The plantation was founded in 1676 and has survived the centuries and important events such as the Revolutionary War and the Civil War. 

We drove down this magnificent path and just took in all the land and the gardens. 
During the month of July the plantation had $5 days where all of the tours were just $5! We signed up for the home tour, garden tour and boat tour. Look at these magnificent trees! 

There were enormous butterflies everywhere. 

We began in the biblical garden. 
“Give fools their gold and knaves their power,
Let fortune’s bubbles rise and fall,
Who sows a field or trains a flower
or plants a tree, is more than all”.
~Whittier 

Descriptions everywhere to read. 

John 12:13
The large “feathery” leaves of phoenix dactylifera, the date palm that is native to palestine, were used as emblems of victory or triumph.
When our Lord entered Jerusalem, the people “too branches of palm trees and went forth to meet him”. 
The middle is shaped like a cross.

Next was our tour of the home. Unfortunately, they did not allowed pictures inside while the tour was going on. Sorry!

It is striking. I can’t believe this house was built that long ago. 
Walking up to the porch. So stately!

Look at how vast this porch is! It was big enough to be a whole house!

Love this photo. It is a photo of the backyard. 
My husband, daughter and me.
Next, we took the boat tour around the grounds. 

This use to be where they made rice. There were lots of small alligators around.
After the boat tour and we walked the grounds a bit more. 

My husband taking pictures in the distance.

It was dreadfully hot! 
Beautiful blooms around the property.

A great place to have a wedding. 

I did manage to find some magnolias. Glorious aren’t they?
I almost forget to mention that peacocks roamed the property! I mean how elegant is that?

I did look around the gift shop and spotted some blue and white pieces. 
Honestly, my family and I has wonderful time and I truly enjoyed just walking around and discovering all of the features of this home. If you are ever in Charleston, I would highly recommend it. 
(photos via Mrs. Shockley)

A Rosemary Inspired Party

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Have you ever see a beautiful photo on Pinterest and began clicking on the sources to try to find out where you can locate whatever it is that you have fallen in love with? Yes you have? Good! Because I didn’t want to be the only nutty person to do that.

Okay, this is the Pinterest photo that I became enamored with. So I clicked on the sources link and it took me right to Traditional Home. It was in an article from 2011 written by Krissa Rossbund and Julianne Hilmes. It was a patio party inspired by rosemary bushes. 
The china and table setting is stunning. Again, I would not have thought to put blue and lavender together. It is quite beautiful. 
An up close look at the floral arrangement. Beautifully done…..
Okay, so can we just stare at the garden chairs for a moment. These are exquisite! I love that they are different. 
A beautiful pear, pancetta and feta salad. The recipe is below…
  • 6 slices pancetta (about 4 ounces)
  • 1 to 2 ripe Bosc pears
  • Lemon juice
  • 1 small red onion
  • 1/3 cup extra-virgin olive oil
  • 2 tablespoons pomegranate molasses
  • Kosher salt and pepper to taste
  • 6 cups torn mixed greens
  • 6 tablespoons French or Greek feta, divided
Preheat oven to 350°F. Place pancetta slices on baking sheet lined with aluminum foil lightly coated with cooking spray; manipulate slices into tight circles. Bake about 15 minutes, or until desired doneness. Set aside; cool.
Using mandoline set at 1/4-inch thickness or less, slice pear lengthwise. Select 6 largest, most appealing slices. (Reserve remaining slices for another use). Brush lemon juice over pear slices. Rinse mandoline and adjust blade (if desired). Thinly slice half the onion. (Reserve other half for another use.)
In medium bowl, whisk together oil and molasses; season with salt and pepper to taste. To serve, toss greens with dressing. Divide evenly between plates. Top greens with onion, pear slice, pancetta, and 1 tablespoon feta. Makes 6 servings.
And oh my does this look delicious! A ricotta cheesecake with blackberry sauce. Looks yum!
If you wish to read the original article you may do so here. This sure has inspired me in the clothing arena. I will now check my closet to see if I have any lavenders and blues that I can put together. See Pinterest continues to inspire. 
(photos via Traditional Home)

A Historic Home Tour in Charleston

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I was really trying to visit more than one historical home but we could only seem to fit in one. The house that we visited was called the Nathaniel Russell House.

Walking up to this beautiful neoclassical home. 
The wonderful gardens. For a moment I felt like I was in England. 
I wish it was spring. I could just imagine the magnolia flowers in bloom. 
One of my favorite photos….
Once inside our tour guide began with this wonder. There were lots of details in these stairs. 
The windows….
I was fascinated with this piece. I could not remember what it was but I had to get a picture. 
As you can imagine I loved this setting. The blue and white looks so charming. 
Just look at the details in this ceiling. It’s extraordinary!
I was enamored with this room. The orange color on the walls, the drapes and how they flowed from windows, the antique blue and white chair. Not to mention the beautiful color of the original floors. 

The outdoor balcony…..
Then we entered this room. This is where the lady of the house would entertain her friends. I must admit that while our tour guide was discussing all of the details my attention to her was “in and out”. I just could not stop looking at all of the features in each room. 
One thing did happen during our tour. We were with a young family who were from the Netherlands and they were apart of our group. Once our tour guide began discussing how Mr. Russell was a slave broker their youngest daughter immediately turned to me and began staring. 
I don’t know what she expected. I guess she was waiting to see if I would get upset and have a fit or if I would just fall apart. I guess she was that curious about my reaction. She stared so much that it made our tour guide uncomfortable. She then stated in the middle of her explaining the job of Mr. Russell that “this was apart of history” and I agreed with her. I nodded to make her feel secure in what she was saying and to let the young girl know that all was well with me. Honestly, it is apart of history and African Americans were not the only slaves in history. So moving on…..
I had to get a photo of this beautiful Wedgwood piece 
Walking into the last room my daughter immediately noticed the harp. I could only imagine how much that was worth. 
Just look at the details!!!! She said it took years to restore everything. 

Just love the colors. 
It was a lovely tour and I did enjoy it. A lot of times I am inspired by the decor. It helps to come up with ideas for decor at home. Like some of the colors in this room. I would have never had thought to put pink with blue but it looks lovely. I believe the color of the furniture and the rug is pulling it all together. I hope that you enjoyed this tour and if you are ever in Charleston stop by the Russell home. 
Thanks for reading!
(photos via Mrs. Shockley)

Our Meander to Rainbow Row

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It has been three weeks since we have returned home from Charleston and I am still thinking of it. It was such a magical place to me. I was so content just walking around and looking at all of the homes. It was splendid….

Before getting to Rainbow Row, we decided to park the truck and walk around the neighborhood. Pink houses were everywhere and I wanted to take a picture of each one of them. 

Everyone seem to have planter boxes outside their windows. A lot of people had fresh jasmine! You could smell it down the street. 

So colorful and vibrant.
Such a gorgeous neighborhood. It is shocking to know that in 1778 a fire destroyed most of this neighborhood. 
We turned the corner and there it was…… Rainbow row. 
My daughter and I just walked up and down the street looking at all of the pretty pastel colors. 

One of my favorite snapshots from the neighborhood. I love this picture! I can’t believe that I took it!
Such a nice area and a beautiful day weather wise. I thought that it was going to rain but I am glad that it didn’t. I really enjoyed looking at these homes and sharing this moment with my family. 
Another place that we stopped by the day before was Sullivan Island beach. It was so quiet and secluded. Although we did not have much sun it was the best day to go because it was the coolest day of the week. I am glad that we were able to see it!

We really enjoyed the beach and loved the place where we had lunch. We ended up eating at Poe’s Taven for lunch and stopped and grabbed some of the best ice cream at Republic Ice Cream. On our way back to the hotel my husband was gracious enough to let me stop at a few consignment stores. I refrained and did not purchase anything but it was nice seeing and visiting these places. 
Thanks for reading!!!
(photos via Mrs. Shockley)