Tips for a Balanced Life

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Well Good Morning Friends,

Thank you to everyone who reached out about my perimenopause blog post from last week. I feel like everyone is on this journey. We are all seeking information and looking for ways to naturally deal with the changes in our bodies. The good thing is this is getting more attention, and we are not just left at the mercy of our hormones. 

I was listening to this podcast (it was so good) and the author has a book called The Art of Chilling out for Women. I must admit I was quite curious, so it has been added to my Amazon book list. 

I am always getting emails about items or things and last month I received a newsletter about secrets to a balanced life from V.J. , the owner of Notiq. 

 

photo credit: L. Shockley 

 

In her newsletter she said, “There is a never-ending argument about the concept of work-life balance. Some say there is no such thing as work-life balance. Others say there can only be work-life integration. What are your thoughts on this? How do you define work-life balance in your own life?

As a writer and researcher, I do my best to avoid arguments. I share my research findings and personal observations, empowering you (my audience) to discern what is best and meaningful to you in your own life.

In my many years of research, here is what I have found:

  1. Balance isn’t doing everything.
  2. Balance isn’t knowing everything.
  3. Balance isn’t pleasing everyone.

YES! I could not agree with this beginning more! I certainly did not know this or didn’t believe it. 

She goes on to share her thoughts on “Life Seasons” which I found intriguing.

“This past weekend, I had the honor of speaking at a retreat designed to inspire women to recharge. During my sessions, I shared the three seasons of life many of us go through. These particular life seasons are based on the number of years we’ve had to experience life on earth. I call them Life Seasons. I want to share those three seasons with you today.

Seek Season (ages 1 – 24)

  • The season of searching and discovering
  • The season of learning and awareness
  • The season of “I want to see.”

Success Season (ages 25 – 49)

  • The season of being and becoming
  • The season of doing
  • The season of “I want to matter.”

Significance Season (ages 50 until….)

  • The season of reflection
  • The season of reaping and harvesting
  • The season of “I want to have something to show”

Identifying the season of life you are in can be valuable for several reasons. First, it can help you make better decisions and set appropriate goals based on where you are at in life. For example, if you are in a season of growth and learning, you may prioritize acquiring new skills or education. If you are in a season of doing so, you may focus on adopting systems and tools to help you maximize your time management and resources”. 

Understanding your current season can also help you appreciate and make the most of the present moment rather than constantly striving for something else or comparing yourself with others. It can also provide a sense of perspective and help you navigate life transitions more effectively. We go through many seasons in life.

 

 

Now how inspiring was this? I love the breakdown of the seasons. I seriously believe that I am in season 1 (Seek Season) because I didn’t get to experience it. I married so young and I am now in a season of searching, discovering, learning, and awareness. Now that I am aware that I am in the seek season I will try my best now to rush it but enjoy it. 

How about you? What season do you believe that you are in? Share your thoughts below. Also I wanted to let you all know that the Vintage Vanity Collection is on sale! Each piece is about $10! Order quickly. 

 

 

My Journey with Perimenopause

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Hello Everyone,

I have a short work week this week and hope to get a few things done around the house. We are celebrating the 4th at home with just a small barbecue and some rest hopefully. I really want to head to Meijer to see if they have any flowers or plants. I have been shocked at some of the items that their garden center has. I am hoping to be surprised again. 

Now let’s discuss something serious. I know, I know, the title is a little rough, but we have all gone through it, knows someone in it, or will be going through it here soon. Perimenopause is all over social media and is being discussed by many individuals. I only just learned this term earlier this year. I was having lunch with a few friends when I begin to discuss how I was feeling physically. 

I mentioned how I was tired all the time, could not sleep well (which I NEVER had a problem with), was waking up with moments of body heat, headaches (which I rarely had), noticeable weight gain (that seem to happen overnight), body tightness, fluid retention, and unpredictable periods. My friend then mentioned peri. I didn’t have a clue what she was talking about, but she then told me about Dr. Mary Claire Haver’s Instagram videos and that I needed to watch them. 

Oh my goodness! A whole new world was opened to me, and I begin to look up everything that I could on perimenopause. I then called my doctor to make an appointment with her.

 

Captured at on May 09, 2020 by Stacie Flinner Photography.

 

As usual it would take months to see her, so I decided to try a hormone balancing pill. I was sure that I was in perimenopause. I had all those symptoms all the time and I do recall my mother mentioning it to me in my late 20s early 30s about “early menopause”.  I went to Happy Mammonth and took their hormone test. I answered honestly and everything came out pretty true, so I ordered their Hormone Harmony pills to try. I used them for about 2 months and realized that I was not getting the same results as everyone else, and you have to take 4 pills a day! That to me was a lot. The only difference that I noticed was that I had less upset stomach which I enjoyed but I was still miserable. So I stopped ordering them and moved on with my research.

I met with my doctor, and I did share my bottle of Hormone Harmony pills and she to be careful. A lot of those hormonal pills have metals in them. She did “confirm” that I was mostly likely in perimenopause but of course there are no tests to confirm your hormones before menopause. She then referred me to a dietitian and weight loss doctor. I had a great Zoom call with her, and we are meeting in about two weeks to discuss my meal plan and hormones. 

 

photo credit: Victoria Magazine

 

While waiting on my appointment I have been reading the book Rushing Woman’s Syndrome book and I have learned so much from it. I have learned not only about perimenopause but how being in “fight or flight” has an impact on my body, weight, and hormones. I am now in the section learning about PMS, estrogen, and progesterone. 

I didn’t realize how excessive estrogen could affect your body and give you PMS symptoms. I didn’t know that progesterone is one of the most powerful antianxiety and antidepressant substances that the body makes. One thing that is in the book that has been sticking in my mind is SNS (flight or fight) and PNS (rest and digest). I now know that I am in flight or fight ALL THE TIME. I have been trying to train my mind to rest and digest. This book has been guiding me on how to deal with my hormones and perimenopause in a natural way and I am loving it. One comment that the author had was “Women are not supposed to get PMS. Your period is supposed to just turn up…. no extreme mood swings, no pain, no premenstrual migraines… just menstruation”. 

I certainly hope to get to that someday. I hope my post has helped someone in some way. We are all making these hormonal journeys and I love when women share theirs. I hope that you enjoyed mine. Please share you story below. I would love to hear about it. 

Happy 4th! 

 

 

June Favorites ~ 2024

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Good Morning!

It’s been a moment since I have updated you all on the greenhouse. Well last week was dreadfully hot! I lost some of my plants! It was so horrible. My husband and I still have not found a fan to install in the greenhouse, but we are working on it. I need one badly. I did plant more seeds and got a butterfly bush to put in it but it’s still a work in progress. I also found a small birdcage to place inside of it. I thought a birdcage in it would be wonderful to have. I will share photos later. 

Friends, I must tell you about a movie that a co-worker shared with me recently. It is called Mr. Malcolm’s List. If you are a Bridgerton fan then you will certainly enjoy this movie! I LOVED it and have watched it a few times already. It’s such a treat without all of sex scenes. I am a little tired of that and probably will not continue to watch Bridgerton. It’s just a bit much!

Now let’s get into my favorites for this month…

 

 

My first favorite is my David Austin Roses. I shared these in my post about my greenhouse earlier this month. They are truly elegant. I love all three of them and they each have their own scent and a certain charm. Make sure that you watch Nicolas Fairford’s recent video. He actually takes you on a small tour of the original David Austin Rose location in England. 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

 

Second on my list is my personal fan. I cannot tell you how much I LOVE this thing! It’s easy to charge and fits right into your bag or tote. I carry it everywhere. We have had some horribly humid days and having this to refresh me has been a game changer!

 

 

 

 

Third were these gorgeous pale pink and gold plates from Amazon. I ordered them for a recent baby shower and they were perfect! The quality was unbelievable. Everyone loved them. They came with dinner plates, dessert plates, utensils, napkins, and cups for under $40! 

 

 

Oh my goodness! This fantastic blue and white dress from Bloomchic was a steal! It is under $40, available in plus sizes and it’s blue and white. Need I say more. Look at the wonderful details. 

 

 

Fifth are my solo dinner meals. Sometimes my daughter goes and has dinner with her friends and my husband runs late while working on projects so I get dinner alone and it’s great! On those nights I make my salmon with lemon and dill, steam rice, and roasted cherry tomatoes with spinach and mushrooms. It is a wonderful self-care moment. 

 

 

As I mentioned in my greenhouse post I had to get some garden shoes and these shoes have turned out to be the best thing for me while I am gardening. They are perfect. Easy to slip on and comfy! Now I don’t wear these any other place but my garden and the greenhouse. 

 

 

My seventh are these newly launched scarf ties from Sarah Flint. They can be worn in multiple ways. Around your neck, bag, wrist, you name it! The pattern is lovely and classic. 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

This was another OMG moment. I was a little unsure about this mouse pad but when I saw how much it was, I figured why not order it. It’s outstanding! I love it. It will be my travel mousepad while I am on my work trips. It’s easy to pack away and extremely chic! Order while you can! 

 

 

These days are hot and I love having my Notiq water bottle. I have the large you can order the small. Both are very becoming. I am telling you people will ask you about it. I always get asked about it. It also comes with its own bottle cleaner and is BPA free. Also check out the new arrivals. Like this beautiful blue and white gift box. It’s perfect for putting your gorgeous gifts in and sending it to friends and family. 

 

 

 

Last on my list has been such a gem. I think I shared this in my newsletter last month but finding this was truly incredible. I love having this play on my screen when I am working around my home. I truly does look like a work of art. I would encourage you to take a look at this channel and save all of these beautiful works of art to play on your screen. It will uplift you and bring about elegance in your home. 

As usual I hope you all enjoyed my favorites for this month. I will be sharing my travel favorites soon as I prepare for my work trip to Virigina. Have a wonderful day!

 

  • Affiliate links attached. 

 

 

 

 

Not Putting Yourself First

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Hello Friends,

Sorry the delay in my blog posts but ever since my greenhouse got installed all I want to do after work is be in it. I would normally come home and get some house things done, start dinner and then head upstairs to my home office to start a blog post, work on some items behind the website, read emails, work on the business budget, look for inventory, etc. But now I just want to finish the little house things that are on my list and then head to the greenhouse. Once that is done then I want to grab my current book and head to the porch to read. And so, I have been honoring that. 

 

 

This photo was taken of me almost 10 years ago at the butterfly gardens here in my city. Finding solitude has been a new thing for me. I mean I have always love solitude but have never sought it. When I was reading my book, this section really stood out to me for some reason. 

“On an airplane the safety video instructs you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else. Because if you pass out due to lack of oxygen you will not be able to assist others. It is very easy to pay lip service to this concept and another matter entirely actually to act on it. When you go to meditate or practice yoga or go to a cafe to read your favorite magazine, you are taking care of you and nurturing your soul, and this helps everyone around you”.

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

Now when I read that my old thought tried to creep in. I would picture myself on the plane trying to put my kid’s mask on first thinking, “I can do this and then put mine on”. When in reality I would not. I would have passed out and then my kid would have too and where is the honor in that. For some reason at that moment, my thoughts on self-care were taken seriously! 

A moment that I had recently help pushed this into fruition. I was getting a pedicure at a nail salon unexpectedly. I mean, I got my nails done that day, but my feet were not on the list for that day, and neither was it in my budget. But as I was really enjoying my pedi a thought hit me. “Wait, you should have not gotten this pedi. I mean you just spent money that should have gone to another treatment (waxing) that you have scheduled tomorrow”. Then I thought, now why am I having this treatment? I hate this treatment!!! Why I am spending money on something that I hate and that I don’t consider self-care when I would rather spend that money on a pedi!” 

Self-care should be an activity that I love, and I hate that treatment so at that moment I decided to stop going and to spend my money on something that I love and enjoy! I tell you the moment that I made that decision a burden was immediately lifted off of my chest. Not only did I hate that treatment but I would seriously get anxious whenever I had to go to it! I hated it! 

This was a moment of self-care for me that was needed. So I tell you as someone who has never taken their own self-care seriously, take it seriously. Learn to do things for you because honestly no one else will. If you are a high-performing woman such as myself, start planning days off, treatments or greenhouse time for yourself. I have noticed great differences in my body and mental state. 

Enjoy!

 

(Tip from Dr. Libby Weaver, page 23 in Rushing Woman’s Syndrome)

 

 

 

My Greenhouse ~ An Elegant Adventure

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Hello Friends!

There have been lots of things going on at my home. This past weekend, I made sure that I took some time to sit on my porch and read. I have been trying to pay more attention to my body and rest. I will share more of this journey in a later blog post. 

June is here already, and I am trying to “encourage” my husband to get some of those summer projects done that have been on my list. One of them was the greenhouse which honestly, I am shocked it got done. 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

I love it! I have the Meridian Greenhouse from Costco. It has an automatic roof vent opener to help with humidity and heat and is made with certified wood. There are similar ones on Amazon. You can view them here and here. 

 

 

I wanted a hummingbird for the front, but my husband found a bubble bee. What do you all think? Should I keep the bee or get continue the search for a hummingbird? 

 

 

I had to add some antiques, so I added some vintage plates and this blue and white head planter. I am not sure what to put in it. I could use it to store some gardening tools or to put some jasmine in. I ordered some of these box planters from Amazon as well. 

 

 

I had to add my vintage swan named Charlotte. She fits perfectly in the greenhouse. I have been buying seeds and plants and at this moment I am just trying things out. 

 

photos via: Mrs. Shockley 

 

I did a search on Amazon for greenhouse supplies and a few things did pop up. This large repotting mat for planting and mess control was a game changer in helping me work in the greenhouse. You guys know how much I hate Crocs, but I needed a pair of gardening shoes for the greenhouse, and these were comfortable and looked presentable enough for me to wear. I also ordered this indoor thermometer to get an eye out on the temperature in the greenhouse. 

 

 

Adding David Austin Roses to my garden has always been a dream so when a co-worker told me that a nursery nearby was selling them, I had to go and take a look. The goal was to only buy one container, but we ended up buying 3. We purchased the Poet’s Wife, the Carding Mill, and the Lady of Shalott climbing rose. 

 

 

Walking in my greenhouse each day is such a treat. Seeing my beautiful roses and smelling them, I feel like a little slice of heaven is in my back yard. This past weekend, I potted up my English Lavender seeds, Bunny Tails, and Orlaya Lace. My sweet peas are coming in slowly. I will share those soon. 

 

 

My husband come home with a big surprise. We just planted a Magnolia tree next to the greenhouse. I was shocked that my husband wanted a flowering tree. We have named her Belle and hope that she is very happy in her new home. I think it will be so exciting to have another tree in the backyard especially a magnolia tree. 

I have had a few people ask me if I am going to plant tomatoes, and other vegetables but at this moment I don’t want to. I just feel like every time someone says that they are starting a garden people immediately put pressure on them to plant vegetables. Well, I am not going to at this moment. I just want to plant a beautiful garden of flowers and see where that takes me. I hope you have enjoyed this tour of my long-waited greenhouse. It has truly made my days more joyous! 

 

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The Peony Festival ~ 2024

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Good Morning,

I have been in my greenhouse every evening since it has been installed. I am on a bit of a learning curve, but we will get there. Right now, I am trying to defy the odds. Most of the individuals at the nurseys around my city are telling me that I cannot grow a flower cutting garden in my greenhouse! I WANT TO PROVE THEM WRONG! I know that flower bulbs need to freeze but I really want to try this. I am not saying that I don’t want to plant vegetables down the road but for right now my goal is my very own flower cutting garden. I am hoping that the Lord can guide me.

Did any of you get a bouquet of peonies this year? It seems like the season came and went so quickly! I tried to get out and get more peonies but it seems like everyone in my city was looking for them. 

One place that had tons of peonies and people was the Peony Festival this year. 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

 

I saw these walking up to the festival this year. There were so many peonies and so many people! The word has gotten out and now everyone is coming. I think they may need to stretch it for two days. 

 

 

One flower that caught my eye this year was the Christmas velvet peony. Have any of you ever seen this version or color before? It was quite striking but so beautiful! A company called Mimi Made it by Lattia had these beautiful flowers. 

 

 

These little peony bouquets were so adorable and chic. I loved the pink blush containers and the little statute sitting on the table. This company was local as well as was called Louloudi. 

 

photo credit: L. Shockley – My handbag is the Bentley from MME.Mink. 

 

This was Louloudi’s photo area. Wonderful isn’t it? I am normally not a photo area person, but I could not resist the mannequin with the peony dress. I mean no one could! 

 

 

 

I walked around the festival with my flowers in my tote like this and EVERYONE stopped me about the bag and flowers. Lauren said that as I was walking thru the crowd women were leaning over to smell my bouquet. Love it!

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

As we were leaving the festival a door was opened to a historical home and the owner was standing there. I looked over and said, “Can I come in and look around”. He said, “SURE! Come on in!” Turns out it was a newly renovated historical home turned into an Airbnb called Timeless on Tenth. 

 

 

The interior designer took me through the entire home giving me a tour and telling me about all of his FB Marketplace finds! I could not believe how much he find on FB Marketplace. 

 

 

It was truly a gem to find after the festival. I loved getting the tour and learning about the Indiana Historical Society. 

 

 

We left the Airbnb after the tour, had some brunch with friends and then I got home, and began to place my lush peony bouquets all over the house. I love this part as well. Smelling them throughout my home is such a treat. I also stopped at my favorite local candle vendor called Linnea.  I purchased their Moss and Rhubarb candle from their Botanik Collection. It is so good! I also ordered a few of the travel candles which I will share in a different post. 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

I truly do enjoy going to the Peony Festival every year. As I said, beauty is so important to me in life especially with so much ugly in this world. Just having a snippet of it in my daily life is a necessity for me. 

 

  • This post is not sponsored 

 

 

May Favorites ~ 2024

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Good Morning Everyone,

Well, I had a wonderful few days off. It was so nice to be home and to be able to get some housework done and read a little. I also had resting on my list. I wanted a few moments just sitting on my porch resting and reading. 

I have a few days in the month of June where I don’t have things scheduled so I am hoping to take advantage of that before my work trip in July. I do have some news… MY GREENHOUSE HAS BEEN INSTALLED! I am so excited and honestly in love with it. My husband has been watching lots of reviews on YouTube and we have seen nothing but good things. I will be sure to share it very soon!

Now I have some wonderful May favorites to share with you this month if I do say so myself.

 

 

First on my list are new beauty products that I have been trying (for a year) for the summer. So far this has been the best anti-chafe stick that I have ever had! If you are a plus size gal like me then chaffing legs is your worst nightmare during the summer. I mean my legs have blistered because of chaffing. I have used this stick for over a year and love it!

 

 

The second beauty product is this Dove Melanin Even Tone bodywash. I saw that it was co-created with dermatologist of color and thought I would give it a try. I have been using it for several months now and can say that my armpits are a little “lighter” in color. They had some dark spots in them, but those spots are now gone! I will continue with using it in other areas. 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

Third is the Decorators’ Show House & Gardens candle. I co-created this with some of my fellow Guild members. I shared this on the blog back in February and this was such a fun project. We sold several at the show house this year and I hope to make another for next year’s home. My team at the office loved this and want to have a “team building” session making one this year. I hope to do this in August with them. 

 

 

My organizational projects continue. Fifth on my list is the registration and insurance card holder for your vehicle. I will admit my registration and other car info were just thrown into my glove compartment and I have been looking into finding something and saw this. It is wonderful and comes in many other colors. You will love it. I promise you. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sixth was finding something to hold my EarPods and charger. I would just place this in my bag and have the charger hanging from it. It was really bothering me, so I ordered this hard case to carry both in. It works wonderfully!

 

 

With spring arriving, I was on the hunt for some new faux florals to have in my home. With all of the recent Homeworthy home tours I was so inspired to try some new arrangements. I found these gorgeous faux lilac bushes at Michaels for a steal! If they don’t have them in store order them online. 

 

 

I simply could not pass this up! I saw this on an influencer’s reel and had to order it! I wear glasses in the evenings, and I am always looking for a “safe place” to put them at night. This has been perfect! It comes in several different colors!

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

Now this find here has been a TREASURE! I saw this on another influencer’s reel and had to have it. My goodness if you work from home and use a laptop this is a hidden gem! I ordered this screen extender and I now I cannot go back to just working on one screen. I have two screens at my office downtown and I honestly dread working from home because of the small laptop screen. This has truly made my life so much easier, and I now love working from home again! 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

And lastly is Winston. I have been wanting this faux golden doddle since December and my husband got him for me for Mother’s Day. I just love him. I was inspired by Nicola’s antique sheep that she had in her home. Once I saw those I knew that I could have Winston in the office with me. I changed his collar to this beautiful emerald green and I think it suites him.

 

 

I hope you all enjoyed this month’s favorites. I have several more but I am going to wait until June to share those. Please don’t forget about the beautiful new boutique arrival. I now have two chinoiserie silk scarfs available and they are stunning! Order both for your neck and handbag. 

 

 

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