Elegant Living Archives - A Home for Elegance

A Walk-Through History

April 17, 2025/0 Comments/in Elegant Living, Inspiring Posts /by mrs.sshockley

Good Morning Friends,

Do you have any blooms in your neck of the woods? I certainly do! I love it when my trees begin to bloom. It certainly helps with my morning walks. It makes them so pleasant and beautiful. My tulips did okay in my greenhouse this year. When we install my raised beds, I will be sure to move those to the outside. But I am also trying to give myself some grace because this is the first year of me trying to grow tulips in my greenhouse.

Remember my elegant adventures that I mentioned? Well, I just had one this past weekend. The organization that I volunteer for just had a run/walk marathon through our historical home district and it was phenomenal! This was the 3rd annual Dash by the Past, and it was my first time. It was so nice walking through that area with friends and seeing the gorgeous homes that I have loved since I was a kid.

A photo of me not being dressed up is rare! But here I am in my sun hat that I wear on my morning walks, my black cape, workout sweater, workout leggings, and walking shoes. I was comfy and layered up because it was cold. I still wore a pair of pearls and some big sunglasses.

It was such a beautiful day and a fun walk. We walked about 3 miles and got to look at all the homes in the historical district. There were about 300 people who signed up.

Our Guild group put out all of the Past Decorators Show House post. It was so fun to see each past show house. I have only been in the Guild for 3 years and have learned a lot, had fun, and made friends.

If you live in the area, I hope that you would consider joining us next year. All of the proceeds benefit Eskenazi Health and go toward helping us with our mission to support mental health. Cheers to home beauty and supporting the community!

Afflialte links attached – photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

Spring Plans for my Garden and Greenhouse

March 13, 2025/in Elegant Living, Home Organization /by mrs.sshockley

Hello Friends,

Whew we have had some 70-degree weather here and it has been great! Not having to carry a coat has made life feel lighter. I have been opening windows and letting the fresh air in. It has been so nice. It will also be nice to see our electric bill drop. I hate our bill in January and February. It is horribly expensive.

I have also been going out and checking on my flowers and front garden. I am seeing little buds coming in on my lilac bush, roses, and trees. I have also been going into the greenhouse to check on things as well and I have some progress to report!

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

So in the month of February, I was starting to see some of my tulips coming up. I planted these in November in the greenhouse and so far, it is going very well. My dream is to create a flower cutting garden in my greenhouse. I want to be able to grow my own dream flowers. It will be flowers that I can never find in my local grocery store.

My dream flower that has been on my Pinterest board for YEARS has been the parrot tulip and I am so happy to report that they are coming in beautifully! Oh, my goodness seeing these has made me so happy! I certainly hope that I can continue to grow these in my greenhouse.

My other garden tulips are coming in nicely as well. In fact, they are thriving. I was not sure how they were going to do but they are doing quite well. I also have lots of seeds to plant too. I have some stock, delphinium, sweet peas, mint and a few others. Also, my raised beds just arrived from Home Depot. I will be putting these together in late April or early May. I want to get out of March first. We always have one last snow in March. It’s awful!

A bouquet that I made from grocery store tulips.

A few months ago, I purchased the virtual course called, A Year of Cut Flowers from Create Academy and it has been a dream! I am in the spring section of the course, and it comes with a guide for each section. I would highly recommend taking this course. I have learned so much about soil, equipment, seeds, planting, and patience. I do hope that having my very own flower cutting garden in my greenhouse will come into fruition.

At this very moment our show house is being put together and I got to meet with David with Allisonville Gardens. He is a designer at our show house and works in the gardens. I stopped him this week to ask him about my greenhouse and the goals that I wanted to accomplish. He said that we will chat later this month to come up with a plan and connect me with someone. Fingers crossed that a plan for my vision can be made. I will be sure to give an update when I can!

Have a great week!

Overcoming Hesitations- Living with Quality

February 20, 2025/in Elegant Living, Inspiring Posts /by mrs.sshockley

Good Morning Everyone,

I have recently been having some “feelings about things”. I have been having this “feeling of quality” or a desire for quality which explains my title for this week’s blog post.

It could be the books that I am reading, the old movies that I am watching, but I am having this desire for beauty and quality. Have you ever had that? You are in a store, and you are looking at something. The price is great, but the quality of the item does not satiate that desire that you have. I have had this feeling multiple times when buying bags, jewelry, furniture, flowers, I mean you name it. It has been happening in some of my current shopping experiences.

I can’t explain it but while I am out and about I have this feeling of things needing to be better and it could be society that is bringing on these thoughts, but I just want better. I used to be afraid of wanting better but not anymore. That fear is slowly leaving my emotions.

photo credit: Instagram

I purchased this book sometime last year. It is an eBook that unfortunately it is not available right now. There was a section in the book that inspired the title of this blog post. The author Miranda stated, “I understand that the thought of using tableware can be a bit dauting. There is often a fear of mishandling or misplacing something so steeped in history and value. But here’s the thing- these pieces were crafted to be admired and used, not just displayed. And you deserve to use them to create extraordinary moments in your life”.

I don’t care how much something costs or how “fancy” it is use it!

That is why I continue to live the way I do. This is my newest FBMP purchase! It is a vintage or antique wardrobe. I believe it is from the 1950s. It is sold and the maker is Hickory Manfacturing Company since 1911. The company is known for their high quality craftmanship and timeless designs. This wardrobe is a solid piece, and I cannot wait to put it to use. I gasped when I saw it on FBMP.

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

The photo above is my kitchen counter. I recently purchased this bust from HomeGoods and the plate is from an antique store. It is Limoges china. I now know that I have a deep passion for elegant things and elegant living. I can’t seem to separate it from any part of my life. When I styled this counter and stood back and looked at it, I just smiled. I am overcoming hesitations. Why not have antiques in your kitchen!

My sitting room currently.

Another tidbit that Miranda mentioned in her book in regard to her tableware was, ” Antique tableware is not merely a collection of objects, it is a tapestry with history, art and legacy. These pieces carry an elegance and sophistication that modern items seldom capture. They hold the power to transform a simple meal into a grand affair, turning the ordinary into the extraordinary. In a world where everything feels so transient, these antiques offer a tangible connection to the past- a bridge to bygone eras of charm and elegance”.

I could not agree more. I think that this quote from Miranda can be used in every item in our lives. Our furniture, china, clothes, shoes, accessories. I want my life as a whole to be a tapestry. Everything should be connected to elegance and sophistication. It should be made of quality. I really want to live a life with quality and for my life to be quality. What are your thoughts on quality? Do you seek it as well?

To read more about Miranda here is a blog post about her on Maison Carlyle. Also let me know in the comments below if you purchased her eBook!

Want to hear someone express how important quality is? Just listen to the current owner of Hermes express his thoughts on quality. It’s truly inspiring!

Inspiration for Simple Luxuries at Work

February 12, 2025/in Elegant Living, Inspiring Posts /by mrs.sshockley

Hello,

Can it really be the middle of February? I still can’t believe that Valentine’s Day is this Friday. I told my husband that I only wanted a book and that was it. I don’t have a lot on my list this year.

I hope everyone is doing well. I am still reading my goals and listening to some great podcasts in the mornings while I am driving to my office. I had to share something that I listen to recently and it made me think that maybe I needed to update my list.

Now I have shared new things that I have purchased for my office in the last few years, and they are scattered in the many blog posts that I have so I thought I needed to combine everything into a current post of what my offices look like today.

Now I have two. I have an office downtown for my regular job, and I have an office at home for the blog, home life, the boutique, and my telework days. I love learning from other women what things they have added to their lives in order to bring about elegance to it. Especially with everything going on in our worlds now. I listen to Kaylee Hackney’s podcast called “Simple Ways to Add Luxury to your Workday” and I thought that I would share her list so that maybe we all can get some inspiration for our spaces.

First on her list is gourmet coffee. Now I am not a coffee drinker, but I do love my teas and I have shared my favorite tea which is Harney’s and my vanilla chai tea that I buy from Kroger. I did get a Nespresso machine and talk about lux! I love that thing, and it does start off my morning in luxury!

This is my morning luxury. My vanilla chai tea and foam oatmilk that I am pouring into Royal Albert Old Country Roses teacup and saucer. Use your best at work if you can.

Her second item was fresh flowers. Of course! These are always a part of my luxury items for work and if you have not tried having these around you by now then take a leap! They are so affordable at the grocery store and sometimes on clearance! Give this lux a chance seriously!

Now her third idea was a flameless candle. Now I have not considered this, but this sounds like a great idea! I love a little light in my office. I have lamps around but if space is an issue, then this could be a great lux idea! I saw these on Amazon as well as these and these.

Next up is a standing desk. Now I have not thought of these either but what a great idea. I have had one of these before but the one I had a work was much heavier. This one here looks like a great option!

Of course, I could not forget a wonderful and comfortable office chair! You all know that I purchased this last year and have no regrets. As you know there are several on Amazon. I did find these for only $65! This is my current office now. I enjoy it so much!

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

A simple luxury for work that you may have not thought about are pens and pads. I cannot tell you how important these items are if you work in an office setting. Having great working pens and notepads at your figure tips is a great luxury. I purchased these notepads and pens from Amazon and love them both. These pens are blue ink! My favorite! I love blue ink. Don’t forget about these sophisticated clipboards from Notiq as well as the pen cases. I have both!

Another item that I just got for my office is the space heater. She mentions it in her list and she is right! Having this for this season of winter has been a game changer. My office is so cold in the mornings. I just hit my remote control for my heater and warmth comes my way. It’s a luxury for sure.

We cannot forget about cord organizers. I just got these from Amazon and they work magnificently. I got a pack of ten so that I can use them in my office, car and home. She mentions noise cancelling headphones in her blog post. I have never tried these before but may consider them for traveling. I do love my ear buds for listening to my favorite podcasts. She also mentions artwork and I could not agree more. I would just recommend buying what you love and buy quality. A lamp for your desk is a must. I have two lamps in my office and love having them both. I love Jonathan Y lamps and purchased this one about 3 years ago. There are so many more things that I could add to this list. A few more items of work luxury would be a wonderful work tote, stapler (I love this one), or get a set for your desk. You will be amazed at what this will do for you work life.

I hope everyone enjoyed these tips and I certainly enjoyed Kaylee’s podcast. If you have a moment, you should listen to her podcast. You can also read her blog post and find more inspiring ideas for your lux office. Life is short, make it beautiful!

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Word of the Year ~ 2025

January 16, 2025/7 Comments/in Elegant Living, Inspiring Posts /by mrs.sshockley

Good Morning!

It’s still cold but manageable. I do miss my morning walks. I need them now since I am seeing so many things in the news. My goodness… California. I didn’t realize that the fires were that bad until this weekend when I actually got a chance to sit and watch the news. My goodness… North Carolina is still struggling from the hurricane. So many things Lord, so many. My mornings walks would always help be sort things out in my mind. I am back on my elliptical for the next few months because the mornings are so cold here.

Now as you can see from my title of this blog post I will be sharing my word of the year. For me it is never just one word. My words are always phrases. It always takes me a few days before the end of the year to get my phrase, but it usually comes because of some life event. This year it came because of a recent activity that I did with a therapist. I may share that later, but my word of the year or phrase of the year is “be present”.

Now I catch myself and I have been doing this most of my life, thinking about the future or the past. Those thoughts in most cases provided a distraction from something that I was dealing with at the moment. Now my goal is to be present. In happiness, and sadness. Be present!

I have also started my new planner. Jennifer from the Daily Connoisseur recently shared her planners. I am normally a Day Designer kind of girl but this year I decided to try a new planner called Planned & Proper.

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

This planner is exceptional! I was not sure how it was going to work for me, but it is a perfect fit for my life! I had my name added to the first page, so personalization is an option. The third page is your word of the year page! You write it down along with your thoughts. There are pages for plans or projects, book goals, and brainstorming your big ideas. The daily format is a winner. It provides a section for your top 3 priorities, to-do list, current goals for the day, a timeline, self-care section and daily gratitude. I mean each day has those items for you to jot down!

This planner has so much! There is a body & wellness page for the year, a place for you to map out your goals for your social life and friendship goals, career and business, financial, home and family, spiritual and creativity! It truly forces you to think about your life for the year. Using this planner and brainstorming about your life will take a few days. It’s not some basic planner that you can just jot down a few things. It really does encourage you to think big about your year in detail. It took me about 2 days to fill out my lists for the year and now I just keep going back to them to keep myself on track.

Let me know in the comments section below what planner you are using and if you have already tried this planner. Also share you word of the year. I think this maybe a repurchase for me next year!

Enjoy your week!

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Etiquette for Life- Q & A with Dr. Minju Witte

December 10, 2024/4 Comments/in Elegant Living, Inspiring Posts /by mrs.sshockley

Good Morning Friends!

It is cold as can be here. It got into the low teens, and I have pulled out my winter boots! I don’t know about you, but I am pooped! I am finishing up the last things on my Christmas to-do list and gearing up for 4 holiday luncheons. With all of this in mind I began to think about people. The holidays can be the worse times to deal with people because they are everywhere around this time of the year. Because of this I decided to look for an etiquette coach earlier this year to give me a little guidance.

I ended up finding a coach that was located here in Indianapolis! Her name was Dr. Minju Witte, and I thought I would take a chance and reach out to see if she would have a Zoom meeting with me and she did. We ended up talking about so many things and at that point I realized that I was making a friend. Minju was so kind, soft spoken, and real! She was honest and real about life and her answers to etiquette.

I then asked if she would come and speak at my office for our Women’s Leadership Initiative group and she agreed! I was thrilled. My office enjoyed her presentation so much that they requested she come back and do a second presentation! Of course, I will be booking that soon, but I could not stop there! I then asked if she would be willing to do a Q & A here on the blog and of course she agreed! I posted a question on my Instagram stories asking my followers if they could ask an etiquette coach whatever they wanted what would they ask? The best questions came in and I am sharing Minju’s answers! I hope that you enjoy these, save them, and use them.

1. How do you respond to envy because you are classy?

One of the key traits I value in friendships is the ability to feel genuinely happy for others. Envy often stems from insecurity, but the elegant approach is to channel that energy into inspiration rather than negativity. When faced with envy, maintain your grace and don’t allow toxic energy to disrupt your peace. A true sense of class lies in staying centered and compassionate, even in the face of such challenges.

2. What are five books you would recommend for learning elegance?

Instead of focusing solely on “how-to” books on elegance, I believe true elegance is cultivated by observing and appreciating beauty in daily life—whether through art, films, travel, or even the unexpected details like a striking color combination in a shop window. Elegance is a mindset of curiosity and attentiveness.

Here are five books that inspire an elegant approach to life:

Christian Dior: Designer of Dreams – A stunning exploration of Dior’s artistry and vision.
La Seduction: How the French Play the Game of Life by Elaine Sciolino – A cultural guide to the French way of life.
Emily Post’s Etiquette, The Centennial Edition – A timeless classic on social grace and modern etiquette.
At Home with Madame Chic: Becoming a Connoisseur of Daily Life by Jennifer L. Scott – A celebration of daily elegance.
Mind Your Manners: How to Be Your Best Self in Any Situation by Sara Jane Ho – A practical guide to cultivating poise.

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

This is Dr. Minju Witte at my office doing a presentation called “Civility in the Workplace” in September of this year!

3. How do you stay elegant amidst life’s chaos, especially without elegant role models?

Elegance is about embracing the beauty of everyday life, even in the midst of chaos. Romanticize your routine—savor that morning tea, wear something lovely at home just for yourself, or take pride in small rituals that bring you joy.

Our social media-driven world often ties value to external validation, but true elegance starts with celebrating yourself, for yourself. Dress well because it uplifts your spirit, not because others might notice. Elegance is a deeply personal journey of finding joy in simplicity and cultivating grace within, no matter the circumstances.

4. How do you resist the urge to be overly blunt when expressing opinions?

Before expressing your opinion, ask yourself: Is it true, helpful, inspiring, necessary, and kind? This filter ensures your words have purpose and elegance.

If you’re addressing disrespect or asserting boundaries, approach with honesty that is firm yet benevolent. As an etiquette trainer, I coach clients on how to communicate with “benevolent honesty,” balancing assertiveness with kindness. Remember, elegance isn’t about avoiding conflict; it’s about addressing it thoughtfully and with integrity.

5. No elbows on the table? What gives?

Etiquette depends on context. If you’re dining casually with friends or family and there’s no food in front of you, resting elbows can be fine. However, in formal settings or cultures like France or England, keeping elbows off the table entirely reflects respect and awareness of tradition.

The key is to be a social chameleon—adapting to your surroundings with ease and grace.

6. What steps should one take to avoid or handle toxic women at the office?

It’s natural to encounter colleagues you wouldn’t choose as friends, but professionalism requires navigating these relationships with tact. Good etiquette doesn’t mean being overly nice or allowing boundaries to be crossed. Instead, it’s a tool for maintaining composure, objectivity, and strong boundaries.

Seek support outside of work—through an etiquette coach or other resources—to strengthen your strategies for dealing with toxicity. Remember, toxic behavior says more about the other person’s struggles than about you. Stay focused on your goals and protect your energy.

7. How should one handle hearing others gossip about them?

Let them. Protecting your peace and joy is far more important than attempting to control others’ opinions. Gossip reflects more about the gossiper than it does about you.

Instead, focus on the truth of your own life. Do you respect and love how you’re living? If not, make the changes you need to find joy. Cultivate friendships rooted in trust and mutual respect and let the noise of gossip fade into the background. Truth always prevails, and the only narrative that truly matters is the one you create for yourself.

Photo credit: A. Bryan

Dr. Witte and I at my office presentation in September of this year.

THIS WAS SOOO GOOD! I truly hope that you all found what you needed in this interview. I know that I will be printing this out and taking it to my office to look at every day. I will also be printing it out for my home office. There are so many nuggets of wisdom in this Q & A. I will also be ordering some of these books! Now I am already a Jennifer L. Scott fan so I have her books, but I will be adding the others to her collection as well. I asked Dr. Witte if she would be willing to record a Zoom call with me discussing these questions and anything else that we can come up with and she said Yes! I will be scheduling that with her soon and will be sure to share the video! Fingers crossed I can get it figured out. If you are in the Indianapolis area reach out to Dr. Witte. She is professional, lovely, and would be a fantastic speaker for your business or school. Private lessons are available as well.

Let me know your thoughts below and enjoy your week!

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