Posts that inspiring an elegant life

The Soul of Civility ~ Author Meet & Greet

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Good Morning Everyone,

I hope you all had a wonderful weekend. My weekend was a tad bit longer. We got MLK day off so having that extra day was so helpful. I finished taking down all my Christmas decorations and was able to purge more items! I always feel good when I am able to drop off stuff at the Goodwill. Always a good feeling.

I am now in deep 2024 planning. I discussed a few things on my recently recorded YouTube video. I will link it below if I have it finished by the time, I share this blog post.

In my video I talked about my word of the year and how I was letting myself become frustrated with things and how I was beginning to pull back and allow myself to think and stay composed. That got me thinking about my recent meet and greet with author Alexandra Hudson and her book called the Soul of Civility.

In the first chapter, Alexandra mentions Dr. King’s “Letter from Birmingham Jail” and begins to talk about the difference between civility and politeness. She said, “King wrote that racist laws gave the segregator a false sense of superiority and the segregated a false sense of inferiority. Like segregation, incivility deforms the soul of both the abuser and the abused. Also, like segregation, incivility often originates from an inaccurately low view of personhood. Often, people lash out at others because of their own inaccurate view of self. This can manifest in their deriving their validation in abusing others; but harming others only makes them feel lesser. Appreciating the gift of being human and realizing that when we hurt others with our incivility, we hurt ourselves – is central to reclaiming basic decency in our world.” 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

Alexandra said, “Civility- the motivation behind our conduct that sees other persons as our moral equals and worthy of basic respect- is much deeper, richer, and of greater import than politeness, or external compliance with rules of etiquette. Politeness and manners are the form, the technique, of an act, but civility is more.” 

 

 

I could tell that Alexandra was genuinely interested in each person that came up to her during our meet and greet. Before signing a copy of her book, she asked me what I loved in life and what I did. I told her and this is what she wrote in my book, “Thank you for your passion for beauty! It will heal our broken world”. Love Lexi… 

Her words on civility truly had me thinking about how I think of others and treat them. Am I just being polite, or do I look at them with dignity and inherently valuable? 

 

photo credit: K. Cuppy

 

Alexandra had a very elegant bearing about her when I met her, and you can tell that she does see others with dignity and value. I hope that you can order her book and let it inspire you as well as educate you. 

 

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“And Why are We Living this Way?”

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Good Morning Everyone,

I have had a very busy week! Lots of meetings and Zoom calls! I am looking forward to the extended weekend. I plan on finally taking down all of my Christmas decor. I have been so ready to get everything put up but with my recent closet organization project, I knew that it would take up my entire weekend and it did!

I also need to stop by Bath and Body Works. I want to get some spring scents for my home but I may need to check my cabinets. I think I already have a stash of candles waiting. I also need to film a YouTube video or maybe post a short. We will see what I can get done.

Now what is the deal with this title you may ask? Well, I will be glad to tell you. 

For the last few weeks, I have been doing things around the home and to my frustration things have been broken, I can’t find it, it’s not organized, and so on and so on. So, the phrase, “why am I living like this”, came out of my mouth. As soon as those words came out it was like a revelation. My mind said, “well why are we”? There are so many tools, tips and tricks out there that honestly, we are without excuse not to bring order to our lives. 

I will start with these few things…

 

 

First is my new battery organizer from Amazon. So my husband had a giant sandwich bag of batteries, and they were just stuffed in one of our drawers in the kitchen. Every time we opened that drawer to look for something the bag of batteries would be in the way, some would come out, and I just said out loud, “why are we living this way”! So, I ordered this. Easy fix! And you know what? I had been dealing with that for over a year! A year people! Ridiculous! 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

Next was my mouse. I have been wanting a white mouse for years for my downtown office and other staff kept saying, “can’t the office just order you one”? Well, a few months ago I had a “why am I living like this” moment and I just decided to order one myself from Amazon. Then when I would take my laptop home to work from home the next day, I would stuff my mouse in my laptop case. I then thought, “why don’t I just order my mouse its own case”? So, I ordered this case from Amazon. Problem solved! 

 

 

Now we move to my car. Now I shared a few things that I purchased for my car last year, but there were still some things that I wanted to get for it. I loved my other purchases so much that I decided to finish my list. I went ahead and ordered this car trash can. I absolutely LOVE this thing! Oh my goodness! It’s a great addition to my car. It comes in a set of 2. 

 

 

Then I moved on to my closet. I have been wanting to re-organize my closet for months. I will be honest; this is what it looked like before I got to work on it. This is the worst it has ever been! I sort of just let my shelves go for a few weeks until my new organizational items came.  

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

Here is the end result! I felt like I was not using my space in the proper way. I wanted my shelving system to have more of a boutique feel. So I just and looked at it and figured out what I needed. I knew that I wanted to see my sunglasses, so I ordered this sunglass display, and it looks so much better! I also put my sunglass cases in a box next to them for easy access.

 

 

I also purchased these purse organizers to separate my cosmetic bags and wallets. 

 

 

 

 

Next were my totes. I have been wondering about these tote hangers from Amazon for a while now. So I decided to order one pack and I could not be happier! Oh my goodness! I love them!

 

 

And last on my list were my robes. Now I only have a few but I wanted them in a more centralized area. They were on hangers in a different section in my closet and I never saw most of them. I want to be able to see them and use them so I purchased this over the door hanger rack. It has worked our marvelously! 

I now feel like I have a better system going on in my closet. I am using my space in a way that benefits me and it looks beautiful. Since I did a closet purge, I am selling some of my items on my Poshmark closet. Take a look and make an offer if you want! 

Oh and I almost forgot! My boutique has a new arrival. The Gatsby pearl necklace is available for purchase. It would look lovely with a pair of the blush Cameo earrings! Have a great weekend!

 

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My Word of the Year…

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Good Morning Everyone,

It is the first full week of 2024 and I have my word of the year. Well, I have my phrase of the year and it is “radiate calm”. My post from 2018 popped in my head a few days ago. That quote, “radiate calm” really spoke to me. I have had several moments in 2023 where I felt like becoming unhinged. I let things really get to me instead of maintaining a quiet spirit. Maybe that should be my phrase for the year.

I went back to my post. I still can’t believe that I read the book and wrote this post 6 years ago. The book provided four ways to radiate calm under any circumstance. 1) Stay composed, 2) Avoid drama, 3) Find common ground and 4) Maintain perspective. 

I can recall several moments where I should have used those tips! I have decided to take these four tips and for every week for this entire year I will write one of those tips for the week in my Day Designer to remind me what to focus on.

Another tip or thing that I do is pray and try to breathe deeply. I want to keep my mind and emotions in order. Last year was so full of changes that I felt like I did not have perspective. As I get older that has become very important to me.

 

photo credit: L. Shockley 

 

As I begin 2024, I am trying to remain hopeful that staying composed, praying, and keeping perspective will help me to radiate calm this year. 

Enjoy your week!

 

 

My Small Tour of the Columbia Club

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Good Morning,

I am so ready for the weekend. I plan on cleaning up my entire walk-in closet. I ordered a lot of organizational supplies from Amazon. I will be sure to share what I order. I want to clean it out and turn it into my very own boutique. I am looking forward to it.

Lauren will be going back to college this weekend. I am a little sad. We will miss her! Earlier this week one of my Guild friends invited me and a few others over for a late lunch. It was marvelous! She made salmon, lamb chops, red potatoes, asparagus, couscous, polenta, salad and a homemade apple and pear pie. It was sooo good!

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

She set a beautiful table for us for lunch. 

 

 

What a beautiful lunch! It was such a wonderful time and a great way to start the new year. Then another Guild friend a few weeks prior invited me to lunch and a tour of the Columbia Club. 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

 

The Columbia Club is a private social club. There is fine dining, fitness, wellness facilities, offices, conference rooms and hotel rooms. I have worked downtown for many years and was ALWAYS curious about this club.

When Sue took me to this room, I thought WOW! I could throw a party here if I was a member. 

 

 

Loving the details.

 

 

There were so many different conference rooms and party rooms. Each one decorated differently. This particular room had all of the blue and white. 

 

 

 

 

This space is used for weddings. Just think as a member you could be using this space. 

 

 

 

 

photo credit: My dear friend

 

Sue took me to all of the office spaces which I could use if I became a member. There is also a hotel which you could stay. There is a spa, and lots of events for members. It was a great experience, and I was so grateful that I got to see it. After looking around we had lunch in the French Room. I order their delicious Harvest Apple Salad. It was so good! I am thinking about getting a membership and if I do, I will be sure to share more about this fantastic club!

 I hope you all have a great weekend!

 

 

 

Being Elegant in Public…

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Ready to celebrate the new year? Me…. I am not sure yet. With each new year I know that there should be excitement but for me I am always apprehensive. I never know what to expect for the upcoming year.

I do need to figure out my word for the year and I do know that organizing is at the top of my list this year along with getting my greenhouse installed! I have been on the hunt for small organizational tools and will be sure to share what I order and end up using from Amazon. 

I really want to get my schedule under control. I hope that some recent changes at work will help with that. I also want to get the carpet replaced upstairs this year. Some many home to-dos. 

Continuing with my elegant appearance as best as I can is always number one and the photo below is one of the number reasons why I dress my best every day. 

 

 

Yes, this is a photo of me. So about two years back my family and I were at an ice-skating event, and they had some news anchors there. What I did not know was they were filming the event for their recent news story. 

I was caught in some of the footage, and they have been using it ever since. So, every year now for the last two years people text me and my husband saying that “I was on the news”!  But no one has been able to send me a snapshot until this year. 

When I got this photo I thought, “okay I look put together” because honestly you just never know how you might be caught on camera. I then looked at my husband and said, “You see this is exactly why you should always try to look your best”. You never know who or what is around you. I have said this so many times on my blog. Always look your best. If you need any ideas for a new year resolution, let this be one. Have a great weekend and Happy New Year!

 

 

 

Christmas Happenings…

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It’s the end of the year already and here shortly I will be sharing the top posts for this year. But I just wanted to say thank you! Thank you to all of you who are STILL reading the blog. My 10-year anniversary for the blog will be coming up soon and honestly, I am surprised every year that I am still blogging.

My blog and/or website has truly been a blessing for me. I really needed something other than my job and this blog has given me new friends, and new opportunities! I do love it and hope that you still enjoy reading it and being inspired. 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

 

I really enjoyed the Christmas decor around my home. I look forward to going out in about a week and looking for decor that might be on sale. Especially at the antique stores.

 

We had our Guild luncheon and it was a lot of fun! I love seeing the Woodstock Country Club all decorated and festive. It is truly a beautiful place. 

 

 

I had to sneak in a “bathroom selfie”. The wallpaper in this room….. I just love it! We had a speaker at our luncheon this year and I will be sure to share her in another blog post. 

 

 

 

I was on the decorating team this year and it was a lot of fun being there early to help set up the dining room for our luncheon. This year we kept things simple and added poinsettias, velvet fabric, glitter ornaments, and vines. I will tell you this, I learned a lot working with these ladies about affordable decor options. Our favors this year were these cute compact mirrors that we ordered from Amazon. 

 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

 

After the luncheon I decided to go on over to the Lily House and tour it again. Truth be told this is my dream home and I have it saved to my wish list gallery on my phone. I can’t get enough of the chinoiserie walls and beautiful fabrics. 

 

 

This hall is always fun to walk down. The beautiful lanterns are the perfect pop of color in this area. And the floors don’t disappoint. 

 

 

This is the dining room in the Lily home. If you missed my tour of the Lily house you may read it here. This past weekend Lauren and I went to see the Nutcracker as well. My husband and I went and toured the new RH Indianapolis gallery and a good friend of mine took me to tour the Columbia Club downtown. I will be sure to share these elegant adventures in the days to come. Until then have a Merry Christmas and don’t forget to shop the boutique. The BLKFRIDAY23 code is still available, and you get 20% off the entire boutique when you use it! Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Victoria Magazine’s New Journal

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Good Morning Everyone!

We are almost in the home stretch! I have one more holiday luncheon for this season and one more party to attend. I am looking forward to being done! I know that sounds bad, but I have been the lead for two of these parties and I tell you it is a lot of work! Today I am working from home. Rick and I will be going to the new Restoration Hardware Gallery and restaurant that just opened in my city later this afternoon! It is located in the Christal DeHaan estate. It is gorgeous! I hope to share photos soon. 

Today I wanted to share a beautiful new journal that I purchased from Victoria Magazine. 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

 

If you follow Jennifer L. Scott on the Daily Connoisseur, then you would have seen this beautiful journal on her Christmas holiday gift guide video. I knew as soon as I saw it I wanted it!

 

 

Just look at the inside. The journal is well made and has lots of beautiful photos from the magazine. I love that feature. I think that when you write an entry and have a beautiful photo next to your entry it could provide so much inspiration, hope, and beauty. I think adding this to their journal was brilliant.

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley

 

The French blue cover with gold letters truly beckons your heart to write. It also has gilded page edges and a satin bookmark. It truly is a timeless journal. I am not sponsored but I would really consider ordering one especially if you journal like me. It will be a great addition to your collection. I love to journal and my blog entry from 2016 explains why. I hope it inspires you to journal as well!