Archive for category: Elegant Living

We are in an age where sharing everything has become the norm and keeping things private has become weird. It is so easy to get caught up in sharing too many details about one’s life.

I wrote a small blog post about this last year, see here. I try to make sure I practice this on a daily basis. Learning to find the balance between sharing your life and keeping things private is very hard sometimes.

We as women can have a tenancy to want to share and discuss everything with our girlfriends, co-workers, and family members. I have had my “oops I should have not said that” moments. I hate that! But since I am getting older I am learning to pause in between my thoughts before I speak.

There are some things that should be left unsaid. I had someone recently tell me that I didn’t post as much on Facebook anymore. I was very happy to hear that. For the most part I post photos or statuses that inspire. When I joined Facebook in 2011 I was venting things and emotions that I should have kept to myself but as I can see I am learning.

I read this recently from Jennifer L. Scott’s book about “the Air of Mystery”. She said, “Poise resides in the space between our thoughts. If we pause, we are less likely to say something that is not in our best interest. We will not engage in a “Twitter feud” because we will have paused and assessed. Your secrets will stay safe. We must remember that poise is in the pause. Pausing when agitated. Pausing when excited. Pausing before saying something that isn’t wise to say.

I could not have said it better myself. I am going to make an extra effort in keeping an air of mystery. Because there is beauty in mystery.

I am still reading Polish Your Poise with Madame Chic by Jennifer L. Scott. Her books are always wonderful reads! The section that I want to share today is Ways to Practice Good Diction.

Jennifer gives 11 ways to clean up your language and to speak with clarity and intelligence. I have been on a quest to become an elegant bearing woman and in today’s society, it is NOT easy.

Rude people are everywhere and always want to challenge “your elegance”. But we must remain strong and continue on the right path.

Here are her tips:

1) Become an avid reader


2) Read classic literature


3) Learn a new word each day and use it in your speech


4) Listen to yourself when you speak


5) Eliminate vulgarities


6) Avoid excessive use of “like” and “um”


7) Avoid slang in most social situations but sill remain au courant with the culture


8) Pause (and think!) before you speak


9) Become okay with silence


10) Listen to audiobooks and be inspired by the eloquent readers


11) If you’re feeling nervous in a social setting, choose silence over mindless babbling 


I love these tips and would encourage everyone to include them in your thinking. It’s a rude world out there let’s try to overcome it!