Blog posts that inspire

A Walk-Through History

 

 

Good Morning Friends,

Do you have any blooms in your neck of the woods? I certainly do! I love it when my trees begin to bloom. It certainly helps with my morning walks. It makes them so pleasant and beautiful. My tulips did okay in my greenhouse this year. When we install my raised beds, I will be sure to move those to the outside. But I am also trying to give myself some grace because this is the first year of me trying to grow tulips in my greenhouse. 

Remember my elegant adventures that I mentioned? Well, I just had one this past weekend. The organization that I volunteer for just had a run/walk marathon through our historical home district and it was phenomenal! This was the 3rd annual Dash by the Past, and it was my first time. It was so nice walking through that area with friends and seeing the gorgeous homes that I have loved since I was a kid. 

 

 

A photo of me not being dressed up is rare! But here I am in my sun hat that I wear on my morning walks, my black cape, workout sweater, workout leggings, and walking shoes. I was comfy and layered up because it was cold. I still wore a pair of pearls and some big sunglasses

 

 

It was such a beautiful day and a fun walk. We walked about 3 miles and got to look at all the homes in the historical district. There were about 300 people who signed up. 

 

 

Our Guild group put out all of the Past Decorators Show House post. It was so fun to see each past show house. I have only been in the Guild for 3 years and have learned a lot, had fun, and made friends. 

 

 

 

If you live in the area, I hope that you would consider joining us next year. All of the proceeds benefit Eskenazi Health and go toward helping us with our mission to support mental health. Cheers to home beauty and supporting the community!

 

 

 

  • Afflialte links attached – photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

 

 

 

Scheduling Elegant Adventures

 

 

Well friends, how is everyone? Are we ready for spring? The trees in our neighborhood are starting to bloom and my peonies are perking up through the ground. We are waiting a few more weeks before we install my raised beds, and I am ready to have some warmer walking mornings.

Oh goodness… my title. I tell you I have been having some deep life thoughts lately. Especially around how I want to live. There are so many ugly things going on in this world. I try to limit my news watching and doom scrolling. I am also trying to monitor my stress at work. That has been really hard with all of the changes that we have been having.

I came up with this idea “scheduling elegant adventures” when I was meeting with my doctor and therapist. Yes, I have a therapist, and it has been the best thing ever! I have been going for almost a year, and I believe it was one of the best decisions that I have made so far. I was discussing with her my idea about elegant adventures, and she loved it!

I was also discussing it with my dietitian as we talked about my stress management and weight. I mentioned to some of the girls in my Pilates class and everyone took it in like “wait a minute maybe I should try this”. What I realized is that taking a vacation once a year for one week is not enough for me. Not anymore. I need more beauty, more time alone, and more adventures.

So on my elegant adventures list, at least once a month, I go to dinner with my “Guild Girls” and last month we went duckpin bowling.

 

 

We had the best time! I had a blast. I really did. It forced me to slow down, play a game, and enjoy the moment. We went to dinner right after that and it was a wonderful adventure! 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

I tried a non-alcoholic strawberry daiquiri. It was so good! We also walked around the Bottleworks hotel which was very beautiful. This past weekend I decided to have another elegant adventure. 

 

 

I have been wanting to go and see Swan Lake at the ballet for years now and I got a ticket and went. It was a beautiful ballet, and I am so glad that I went. I sat in the balcony. I sat with two couples. I went alone and had no regrets. The couples were so nice and funny. We all had a great time! Honestly, I have never read the story about Swan Lake and read it in the program. It is VERY interesting. I thought the Indianapolis Ballet did a great job. They are the same production that puts on the Nutcracker each year and the Indianapolis Symphony orchestra played the entire time. Talk about “seeking the arts”. 

For the month of April, I plan on going to Nordstrom Rack. I rarely get to go to that store. I also want to go to Consign by Design again, and this has just been added to my radar for this year. Isn’t this hotel GORGEOUS? This is about an hour and 45 minutes away from me and my supervisor told me all about it. I want to go and stay for a few days, tour the hotel, and have a spa day.  Now how wonderful would that be? My goal is to go and do something that I love each month and take that time to get away and just breathe. Stress and high cortisol levels are a real thing, and I just don’t want them to rule me anymore. Elegant adventures each month for me!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are You Growing Your Equity?

 

Hello Everyone!

I tell you I have been breathing a lot heavier these days. There is so much going on from extra duties at work, to changing homeowners’ insurance and car insurance, to doctor appointments, keeping up the home, exercising, planning trips, and even planting seeds in the greenhouse. My planner is full every day. I am trying to give myself a day where I don’t look at my phone, planner, or t.v. Geez. 

One thing I am starting to focus on is building my career equity. I have not told you all yet but I am reading Career Forward by Grace Puma and Christiana Smith Shi. I got to hear both of these women speak at the Indiana Women’s Conference in November. Once I heard them speak, I knew that I wanted their book. 

I am in a season in my life where I am having a lot of change. I am also in a position where it can become stagnant if you let it, and I am a person who refuses to do that. With each job that I have had I sort of “made it my own”. Each person before me in the position did not do much with it. They rarely sought out training and rarely got out of the box. I always wanted to think about my position in a long-term fashion and it has worked for me. 

 

photo credit: A. Bryan 

 

The position that I have now (paralegal supervisor) has been my most challenging position ever. Not only am I assigned to my own attorneys, but I have a team to manage and cover. I am also still responsible for my growth which is where Chapter 3 Growing your Professional Equity comes into play. I know with each year passing by I ask myself “how do I keep growing, how do I stay relevant?” 

Christina and Grace said, “as you start focusing on building professional equity, let’s continue the analogy with this idea: think of yourself as a grow stock”. When I read that I thought, “oh okay. She said, “simply put, a growth stock is a company that is expected to increase in value at a faster than average rate. If you think of that stock as a person, it’s someone who is always looking to grow and develop and expand their career at a level significantly above average.” 

I have started this thought process already. I have been a supervisor for 4 years now and decided to branch out about 2 years ago into another program in the department. It is an extra duty on top of my current ones but provides SO much growth. I get to go to other districts, network with other supervisors on my team, and evaluate other offices. It has been such a rewarding aspect and a growth stock for my career. I recently decided to become an instructor at one of the departments biggest educational agency. At this very moment I am preparing a presentation regarding civil discovery for about 150 participants and will be teaching this presentation with another paralegal live! When I tell you this has challenged me in so many ways, I mean it! This presentation will also be recorded and saved to the department’s educational website. Which means my teaching will be a permanent video for other paralegals and attorneys to review year after year. Umm no pressure!!! I am also scheduled to be on a paralegal supervisory panel in September discussing our careers and ways to develop yourself in person in South Carolina. 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley (Washington, D.C.) 

 

Another tip from Grace and Christina is, “when you think of yourself as a growth stock, it helps you get into the right frame of mind for driving professional success in the short and long term. As your stock rises, your company reaps the rewards of your performance. But just as important, you’re likely to experience a host of personal benefits, such as increased compensation, a greater ability to shape your role at the company, enhanced job security, and more opportunities to transition to a desirable role at a different company”. 

Christina and Grace also discuss equity. They said to think of it as value. They mention how to spot the equity players in your job. Equity players are promoted/selected for representation and messaging at company forums and meetings. They are often chosen to lead highly visible strategic company projects. They appear to get CEO, C-Suite, and board exposure. Are sought out behind the scenes by employees and peers for personal and professional opinions. They tend to advance quickly in role and scope; have input that carries weight and drives decisions or actions. Lastly, they are happy, energized and confident. 

If these individuals exist in your work environment, get to know them and how they tick. I hope you all have found these tips helpful. Our careers can shape our lives, but I think we can learn to build equity if we are strategic. 

Have a great week!

 

 

 

 

Tips from: Career Forward; Strategies from Women Who’ve Made it by Grace Puma and Christina Smith Shi- Chapter 3; page 32 

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Overcoming Hesitations- Living with Quality

 

 

Good Morning Everyone,

I have recently been having some “feelings about things”. I have been having this “feeling of quality” or a desire for quality which explains my title for this week’s blog post.

It could be the books that I am reading, the old movies that I am watching, but I am having this desire for beauty and quality. Have you ever had that? You are in a store, and you are looking at something. The price is great, but the quality of the item does not satiate that desire that you have. I have had this feeling multiple times when buying bags, jewelry, furniture, flowers, I mean you name it. It has been happening in some of my current shopping experiences. 

I can’t explain it but while I am out and about I have this feeling of things needing to be better and it could be society that is bringing on these thoughts, but I just want better. I used to be afraid of wanting better but not anymore. That fear is slowly leaving my emotions. 

 

photo credit: Instagram

 

I purchased this book sometime last year. It is an eBook that unfortunately it is not available right now. There was a section in the book that inspired the title of this blog post. The author Miranda stated, “I understand that the thought of using tableware can be a bit dauting. There is often a fear of mishandling or misplacing something so steeped in history and value. But here’s the thing- these pieces were crafted to be admired and used, not just displayed. And you deserve to use them to create extraordinary moments in your life”. 

I don’t care how much something costs or how “fancy” it is use it! 

 

 

That is why I continue to live the way I do. This is my newest FBMP purchase! It is a vintage or antique wardrobe. I believe it is from the 1950s. It is sold and the maker is Hickory Manfacturing Company since 1911. The company is known for their high quality craftmanship and timeless designs. This wardrobe is a solid piece, and I cannot wait to put it to use. I gasped when I saw it on FBMP. 

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

 

 

The photo above is my kitchen counter. I recently purchased this bust from HomeGoods and the plate is from an antique store. It is Limoges china. I now know that I have a deep passion for elegant things and elegant living. I can’t seem to separate it from any part of my life. When I styled this counter and stood back and looked at it, I just smiled. I am overcoming hesitations. Why not have antiques in your kitchen!

 

My sitting room currently.

 

Another tidbit that Miranda mentioned in her book in regard to her tableware was, ” Antique tableware is not merely a collection of objects, it is a tapestry with history, art and legacy. These pieces carry an elegance and sophistication that modern items seldom capture. They hold the power to transform a simple meal into a grand affair, turning the ordinary into the extraordinary. In a world where everything feels so transient, these antiques offer a tangible connection to the past- a bridge to bygone eras of charm and elegance”. 

I could not agree more. I think that this quote from Miranda can be used in every item in our lives. Our furniture, china, clothes, shoes, accessories. I want my life as a whole to be a tapestry. Everything should be connected to elegance and sophistication. It should be made of quality. I really want to live a life with quality and for my life to be quality. What are your thoughts on quality? Do you seek it as well? 

To read more about Miranda here is a blog post about her on Maison Carlyle. Also let me know in the comments below if you purchased her eBook! 

 

Want to hear someone express how important quality is? Just listen to the current owner of Hermes express his thoughts on quality. It’s truly inspiring!

 

 

 

 

 

Inspiration for Simple Luxuries at Work

 

 

Hello,

Can it really be the middle of February? I still can’t believe that Valentine’s Day is this Friday. I told my husband that I only wanted a book and that was it. I don’t have a lot on my list this year.

I hope everyone is doing well. I am still reading my goals and listening to some great podcasts in the mornings while I am driving to my office. I had to share something that I listen to recently and it made me think that maybe I needed to update my list.

Now I have shared new things that I have purchased for my office in the last few years, and they are scattered in the many blog posts that I have so I thought I needed to combine everything into a current post of what my offices look like today.

Now I have two. I have an office downtown for my regular job, and I have an office at home for the blog, home life, the boutique, and my telework days. I love learning from other women what things they have added to their lives in order to bring about elegance to it. Especially with everything going on in our worlds now. I listen to Kaylee Hackney’s podcast called “Simple Ways to Add Luxury to your Workday” and I thought that I would share her list so that maybe we all can get some inspiration for our spaces.

First on her list is gourmet coffee. Now I am not a coffee drinker, but I do love my teas and I have shared my favorite tea which is Harney’s and my vanilla chai tea that I buy from Kroger. I did get a Nespresso machine and talk about lux! I love that thing, and it does start off my morning in luxury!

 

 

This is my morning luxury. My vanilla chai tea and foam oatmilk that I am pouring into Royal Albert Old Country Roses teacup and saucer.  Use your best at work if you can.

 

 

 

Her second item was fresh flowers. Of course! These are always a part of my luxury items for work and if you have not tried having these around you by now then take a leap! They are so affordable at the grocery store and sometimes on clearance! Give this lux a chance seriously! 

Now her third idea was a flameless candle. Now I have not considered this, but this sounds like a great idea! I love a little light in my office. I have lamps around but if space is an issue, then this could be a great lux idea! I saw these on Amazon as well as these and these

Next up is a standing desk. Now I have not thought of these either but what a great idea. I have had one of these before but the one I had a work was much heavier. This one here looks like a great option! 

 

 

 

 

Of course, I could not forget a wonderful and comfortable office chair! You all know that I purchased this last year and have no regrets. As you know there are several on Amazon. I did find these for only $65! This is my current office now. I enjoy it so much!

 

 

photo credits: Mrs. Shockley 

 

A simple luxury for work that you may have not thought about are pens and pads. I cannot tell you how important these items are if you work in an office setting. Having great working pens and notepads at your figure tips is a great luxury. I purchased these notepads and pens from Amazon and love them both. These pens are blue ink! My favorite! I love blue ink. Don’t forget about these sophisticated clipboards from Notiq as well as the pen cases. I have both! 

Another item that I just got for my office is the space heater. She mentions it in her list and she is right! Having this for this season of winter has been a game changer. My office is so cold in the mornings. I just hit my remote control for my heater and warmth comes my way. It’s a luxury for sure. 

 

 

 

 

We cannot forget about cord organizers. I just got these from Amazon and they work magnificently. I got a pack of ten so that I can use them in my office, car and home. She mentions noise cancelling headphones in her blog post. I have never tried these before but may consider them for traveling. I do love my ear buds for listening to my favorite podcasts. She also mentions artwork and I could not agree more. I would just recommend buying what you love and buy quality. A lamp for your desk is a must. I have two lamps in my office and love having them both. I love Jonathan Y lamps and purchased this one about 3 years ago. There are so many more things that I could add to this list. A few more items of work luxury would be a wonderful work tote, stapler (I love this one), or get a set for your desk. You will be amazed at what this will do for you work life.

I hope everyone enjoyed these tips and I certainly enjoyed Kaylee’s podcast. If you have a moment, you should listen to her podcast. You can also read her blog post and find more inspiring ideas for your lux office. Life is short, make it beautiful! 

 

 

  • Affiliate links attached 

 

 

 

Word of the Year ~ 2025

 

 

Good Morning!

It’s still cold but manageable. I do miss my morning walks. I need them now since I am seeing so many things in the news. My goodness… California. I didn’t realize that the fires were that bad until this weekend when I actually got a chance to sit and watch the news. My goodness… North Carolina is still struggling from the hurricane. So many things Lord, so many. My mornings walks would always help be sort things out in my mind. I am back on my elliptical for the next few months because the mornings are so cold here.

Now as you can see from my title of this blog post I will be sharing my word of the year. For me it is never just one word. My words are always phrases. It always takes me a few days before the end of the year to get my phrase, but it usually comes because of some life event. This year it came because of a recent activity that I did with a therapist. I may share that later, but my word of the year or phrase of the year is “be present”. 

Now I catch myself and I have been doing this most of my life, thinking about the future or the past. Those thoughts in most cases provided a distraction from something that I was dealing with at the moment. Now my goal is to be present. In happiness, and sadness. Be present! 

I have also started my new planner. Jennifer from the Daily Connoisseur recently shared her planners. I am normally a Day Designer kind of girl but this year I decided to try a new planner called Planned & Proper.  

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley 

 

This planner is exceptional! I was not sure how it was going to work for me, but it is a perfect fit for my life! I had my name added to the first page, so personalization is an option. The third page is your word of the year page! You write it down along with your thoughts. There are pages for plans or projects, book goals, and brainstorming your big ideas. The daily format is a winner. It provides a section for your top 3 priorities, to-do list, current goals for the day, a timeline, self-care section and daily gratitude. I mean each day has those items for you to jot down!

 

 

This planner has so much! There is a body & wellness page for the year, a place for you to map out your goals for your social life and friendship goals, career and business, financial, home and family, spiritual and creativity! It truly forces you to think about your life for the year. Using this planner and brainstorming about your life will take a few days. It’s not some basic planner that you can just jot down a few things. It really does encourage you to think big about your year in detail. It took me about 2 days to fill out my lists for the year and now I just keep going back to them to keep myself on track.

Let me know in the comments section below what planner you are using and if you have already tried this planner. Also share you word of the year. I think this maybe a repurchase for me next year!

Enjoy your week!

 

 

  • affiliate links attached 

 

 

Etiquette for Life- Q & A with Dr. Minju Witte

 

 

Good Morning Friends!

It is cold as can be here. It got into the low teens, and I have pulled out my winter boots! I don’t know about you, but I am pooped! I am finishing up the last things on my Christmas to-do list and gearing up for 4 holiday luncheons. With all of this in mind I began to think about people. The holidays can be the worse times to deal with people because they are everywhere around this time of the year.  Because of this I decided to look for an etiquette coach earlier this year to give me a little guidance. 

I ended up finding a coach that was located here in Indianapolis! Her name was Dr. Minju Witte, and I thought I would take a chance and reach out to see if she would have a Zoom meeting with me and she did. We ended up talking about so many things and at that point I realized that I was making a friend. Minju was so kind, soft spoken, and real! She was honest and real about life and her answers to etiquette.

I then asked if she would come and speak at my office for our Women’s Leadership Initiative group and she agreed! I was thrilled. My office enjoyed her presentation so much that they requested she come back and do a second presentation! Of course, I will be booking that soon, but I could not stop there! I then asked if she would be willing to do a Q & A here on the blog and of course she agreed! I posted a question on my Instagram stories asking my followers if they could ask an etiquette coach whatever they wanted what would they ask? The best questions came in and I am sharing Minju’s answers! I hope that you enjoy these, save them, and use them.

 

1. How do you respond to envy because you are classy?


One of the key traits I value in friendships is the ability to feel genuinely happy for others. Envy often stems from insecurity, but the elegant approach is to channel that energy into inspiration rather than negativity. When faced with envy, maintain your grace and don’t allow toxic energy to disrupt your peace. A true sense of class lies in staying centered and compassionate, even in the face of such challenges.


2. What are five books you would recommend for learning elegance?

Instead of focusing solely on “how-to” books on elegance, I believe true elegance is cultivated by observing and appreciating beauty in daily life—whether through art, films, travel, or even the unexpected details like a striking color combination in a shop window. Elegance is a mindset of curiosity and attentiveness.

Here are five books that inspire an elegant approach to life:

  1. Christian Dior: Designer of Dreams – A stunning exploration of Dior’s artistry and vision.
  2. La Seduction: How the French Play the Game of Life by Elaine Sciolino – A cultural guide to the French way of life.
  3. Emily Post’s Etiquette, The Centennial Edition – A timeless classic on social grace and modern etiquette.
  4. At Home with Madame Chic: Becoming a Connoisseur of Daily Life by Jennifer L. Scott – A celebration of daily elegance.
  5. Mind Your Manners: How to Be Your Best Self in Any Situation by Sara Jane Ho – A practical guide to cultivating poise.

 

photo credit: Mrs. Shockley

This is Dr. Minju Witte at my office doing a presentation called “Civility in the Workplace” in September of this year! 

 


3. How do you stay elegant amidst life’s chaos, especially without elegant role models?

Elegance is about embracing the beauty of everyday life, even in the midst of chaos. Romanticize your routine—savor that morning tea, wear something lovely at home just for yourself, or take pride in small rituals that bring you joy.

Our social media-driven world often ties value to external validation, but true elegance starts with celebrating yourself, for yourself. Dress well because it uplifts your spirit, not because others might notice. Elegance is a deeply personal journey of finding joy in simplicity and cultivating grace within, no matter the circumstances.


4. How do you resist the urge to be overly blunt when expressing opinions?

Before expressing your opinion, ask yourself: Is it true, helpful, inspiring, necessary, and kind? This filter ensures your words have purpose and elegance.

If you’re addressing disrespect or asserting boundaries, approach with honesty that is firm yet benevolent. As an etiquette trainer, I coach clients on how to communicate with “benevolent honesty,” balancing assertiveness with kindness. Remember, elegance isn’t about avoiding conflict; it’s about addressing it thoughtfully and with integrity.


5. No elbows on the table? What gives?


Etiquette depends on context. If you’re dining casually with friends or family and there’s no food in front of you, resting elbows can be fine. However, in formal settings or cultures like France or England, keeping elbows off the table entirely reflects respect and awareness of tradition.

The key is to be a social chameleon—adapting to your surroundings with ease and grace.


6. What steps should one take to avoid or handle toxic women at the office?


It’s natural to encounter colleagues you wouldn’t choose as friends, but professionalism requires navigating these relationships with tact. Good etiquette doesn’t mean being overly nice or allowing boundaries to be crossed. Instead, it’s a tool for maintaining composure, objectivity, and strong boundaries.

Seek support outside of work—through an etiquette coach or other resources—to strengthen your strategies for dealing with toxicity. Remember, toxic behavior says more about the other person’s struggles than about you. Stay focused on your goals and protect your energy.


7. How should one handle hearing others gossip about them?


Let them. Protecting your peace and joy is far more important than attempting to control others’ opinions. Gossip reflects more about the gossiper than it does about you.

Instead, focus on the truth of your own life. Do you respect and love how you’re living? If not, make the changes you need to find joy. Cultivate friendships rooted in trust and mutual respect and let the noise of gossip fade into the background. Truth always prevails, and the only narrative that truly matters is the one you create for yourself.

 

Photo credit: A. Bryan 

Dr. Witte and I at my office presentation in September of this year. 

THIS WAS SOOO GOOD! I truly hope that you all found what you needed in this interview. I know that I will be printing this out and taking it to my office to look at every day. I will also be printing it out for my home office. There are so many nuggets of wisdom in this Q & A.  I will also be ordering some of these books! Now I am already a Jennifer L. Scott fan so I have her books, but I will be adding the others to her collection as well. I asked Dr. Witte if she would be willing to record a Zoom call with me discussing these questions and anything else that we can come up with and she said Yes! I will be scheduling that with her soon and will be sure to share the video! Fingers crossed I can get it figured out. If you are in the Indianapolis area reach out to Dr. Witte. She is professional, lovely, and would be a fantastic speaker for your business or school. Private lessons are available as well. 
Let me know your thoughts below and enjoy your week! 
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